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Swaptimize 

Verb.

To switch places with one's partner in a highly coordinated fashion when showering together in order to optimize the mutual showering experience. This can be done for several reasons: i.e. to minimize water wasted or time spent shivering while outside the stream of water, etc. Generally, it results in the most economically efficient solution to shower sharing. Both partners get water when and only when they need it, and they still get to see each other naked. Win-win.

Other forms:
noun. swaptimization
Jeff: Yo, I heard you showering with your girl this morning. You guys need to hurry it up in there; the water bill is killing me!
Matt: Sorry, bro. She likes shower sex.
Jeff: I get that, but if you're gonna do it at least swaptimize the rest of the time. Shit's getting out of control.
Swaptimize by busterfly April 15, 2013
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swaptimist 

A person who acquires cheap but useless things at swap meets, yard sales and thrift stores.
I thought I'd find a way to use that broken coffeepot I bought, but I guess I was just being a swaptimist.
swaptimist by skuzner January 13, 2010
Related Words

soptimize 

To add bugs to software in the attempt to improve it. Specifically, to add bugs while seeking dubious performance enhancements. From a programmer using the nickname "sopwith."
He's angry I won't accept his patch, but I just can't let him soptimize this next release.
soptimize by Verbal November 11, 2003

Swappisize 

To get the best value to price ratio.
Getting 2 for the price of 1 is swappisizing.
When negotiating a deal you can say to the seller "You better swappisize that biotch!", if you feel the value to price ratio is not good enough.
Swappisize by Swappy May 14, 2004
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Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
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Democrat 2: Well uh, Blexas!
Democrat 1: You've been saying that since 2008 though.
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briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
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Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
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countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
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Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026
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