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The act of calling up an elderly woman in the pursuit of oral pleasure, and then following up by taberknackling the phone and the elderly woman's pet gerbal. This can be done (in the case the speedskater is gay) to an elderly man as well.
Robby: "I just speedskated Old Lady Gertrude down the street. You wouldn't believe how good old lady gums and gerbal fur feels on your nuts."

Casey: "Gee wizz...I can't wait til I can speedskate my gramma!"
by Dick Tracy December 19, 2004
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Oct 3 Word of the Day
I couldn’t care less (but one must keep up appearances, right?)
Frenemy has a family tragedy. "Thoughts and prayers."
by November 05, 2018
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2
A very intense sport envolves skating so fast that you feel like you going faster that the speed of sound even though your grandmother can run faster than you skate. Unless you an Olympian
Guy1 “I’m going so fast right now. I must be going faster than Usain Bolt! I’m the best at speed skating”
Guy2 “no you’re not. That 4 year old is going faster than you”
Guy1 “oh. Sh*t
by Oldbehide November 08, 2018
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