A Shane Holmberg is a gelatinous yet mildly sentient blob. Is currently married to a woman half his age, which he had been grooming for the role since she was only 3 years old. The attempt failed as she still has enough grey matter to seek others such as a Tyrone when not being forced to perform coitus with Jabba the Hut.
The Shane Holmberg spend most of its time abusing chairs and making meals of roasted shoe leather in EZbake oven, as they are not allowed near a real oven for obvious reasons.

A Shane Holmberg’s diet mainly consists of old shoes and soy milk squeezed from his wife's gaping anus.
They also are known for their vehemently supporting the Tobacco industry, by sucking down more than 140,000 chemicals a day, per pack.