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Once ruled and founded by Witchfinder General Lord Boof in 1609; Shasten school is situated on an isolated hilltop (known to locals as Shasten). Much like Azkaban, Shasten School is a high security institution for the most enchantingly gifted pupils from the godforsaken province of North Dorsetshire. Every year the institution sends several students to the poverty stricken nation of Rwanda where they can take advantage of the dire misfortune of others in order to gain something sycophantically cringeworthy to put on their personal statements and CV's alike. Shaftesbury school students can be differentiated from Sturminster Newton and Gillingham students by a distinct lack of webbed feet.

Notable alumni include; Paddington Bear, Tony Bear, and much loved Shakesperian villain Iago.
PUPIL 1: Is it your first day here?
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PUPIL 2: Yes?
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PUPIL 1: Boarder or local?
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PUPIL 2: Local.
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PUPIL 1: Well Frightfully sorry sir, it makes no difference - welcome to the mad house!

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ANONYMOUS STUDENT: What school do you go to?
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SHASTEN PUPIL: Shaftesbury School.
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ANONYMOUS STUDENT: Could be much worse, could be Gillingham!

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SHASTEN LOCAL 1: Those Shasten school students are a most peculiar bunch.
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SHASTEN LOCAL 2: Yes... Quite!
by K_D2111 January 22, 2012
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The hellhole where mrs lindsley (the fat fuck) works. She looks like she’s devoured a couple hundred children not going to lie. Mr mcmuffin works there too, hes a peadophile he tries too look up girls skirts and tries to touch them. The school threws you in isolation if you talk in class and there are a couple cows that attend and make beef every single fuckin day. If you go, leave.
*stranger* hello, can i have directions to shaftesbury school?

*student 1* you wanna visit that shithole? you might get flattened and beat by the creator of obesity mrs linsey
*stranger* okay i have second thoughts.
by what’reyadoinm8 May 09, 2018
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