Pork Scotch Van 

A clapped-out white van driven by miserable little security guards. These vehicles are filthy and frequently break down. The fat driver will often try to save a parking place for himself by putting a traffic cone in the road outside his house. This annoying practice is best dealt with by rescuing the cone from the fat guy's possession and installing it in the back of a Maltby lorry two streets away.

What do you call a toilet on wheels?

A Pork Scotch van.

Pork Scotch Van by Lumpbag May 10, 2009