Pooptending

When a person pretends to go poop to get out of something they don't want to do.

A guy was at his work and had an hour left so he that he was dreading so he told his boss he needed to go poop because he knew nobody would question him if he said he needed to poop. Pooptending.

Pooptending by DerumCapz October 4, 2016

poontending 

Tending to your poon. When you have to spend time with your fine lady friend instead of doing something possibly more exciting.

I'd like to go out tonight, but I have some poontending to do.

I wish that i had a high poontendance in my classroom...
and by classroom i mean pants

poontending by josedagardner March 27, 2006

Poopreading 

The act of proofreading a paper or memoir on the shitter. The toliet offers a much more comfortable- and some times luxurious- alternative to confining oneself to a stuffy office or desk in order to correct a student's or colleague's work.

Person: Finally, I finished this fucking paper. Can you look it over for me and make sure I didn't make any spelling errors?
Friend of Person: Sure thing. I feel a monster dump coming on so I don't mind Poopreading your paper.

Poopreading by Keeeeeeen March 30, 2009

poopening 

a major event of defacation, brought on by overeating, gastro-intestinal distress, accident, or a long bout of constipation

So I guess I shouldn't have scarfed down those three bean burritos and the had that triple latte, because I went home and had a poopening.

poopening by Steven Herraiz July 6, 2014