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A guy who claims to be poly and uses the sociological and political complexities / sensitivities of queer and/or alternative lifestyles as a way to justify his fuckboy behavior (both to himself and to others). Claims that sex is how he begins his friendships and relationships because it's just "how he is," when really he is not interested in people beyond the sexual part of the relationship. Will adopt terminology and concepts of polyamorous, queer, or kink lifestyles as a way of presenting himself as open-minded and "not like typical guys." If the girl questions or calls it out his disingenuous behavior, he will express "concern" that her questioning represents an underlying "desire to control" the relationship (quoting his learnings from books he's read about polyamory). Other symptoms: attempting to control the communication methods and/or frequency with a potential partner; making assumptions and judgements about a girl's behavior as a defense mechanism or distraction from his own; using sex as an audition for friendship or a way to control how the friendship begins; consistently giving himself an 'out' or putting an end time on every hangout (but ignoring this end time if he thinks he may get laid or receive any kind of physical attention); expressing interest in platonic friendship but then failing to prove genuine interest or the ability to hold a conversation beyond sex-related topics; gaslighting; mansplaining; arrogance; signs and symptoms of a sociopath.
Allison: Me and Kevin are in an open relationship, so I'm looking for friends with benefits. Should I go out with James?

Brenda: I'd say yes if you just wanted to get laid and talk about nothing but sex, but he's a classic poly fuckboy, so not really friend material.
by AshleyJameson17 August 05, 2018
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