Pit Hag

A female of indeterminate age who expresses a determined and voluble preference for Pit Bull type dogs, rather than her fellow humans. A Pit hag is usually either a young woman without children, or an older woman whose children have left home. Denied appropriate objects of maternal affections, these women focus on a type of dog that appears to need 'protecting' from media attention when they maul or kill someone (which they do rather often).

The Pit Hag is subject to instant unstoppable outrage and unwise protectionism, often to be found in news commenting sections, abusing the victim of the dog attack, blaming the owner of the dog, or various sundry and unlikely 'catalysts' such as the weather or the sound of a lawn-mower.

The Pit Hag is a creature of modernity, given her platform thanks to social media. In the case of older Pit Hags, we very often see 'adoption' of unwanted Pit Bulls from rescue societies, sometimes several of them - this fulfills the Pit Hag's need to nurture and protect, although very often she is the unhappy recipient of violent attacks from her unruly 'children'. The more youthful version of the Pit hag is usually a teenager or a woman in her 20's with delayed maturity issues, who groups together with other like-minded individuals in the name of 'animal rights'. This unfortunately translates in the mind of a Pit Hag as an animal's 'right' to maul or kill someone, conferring no rights to their victims.

Did you see the Pit Hag blaming the victim of that pit bull mauling on a mauling thread?

Pit Hag by MixMaster Bogart September 6, 2016

Pithagorean 

A disciple of the Greek mathematician Pythagoras (c. 500 BC), who was puzzled that for any circle, the ratio of its perimeter to diameter has always the same approximate value of 3.1, leading them to wonder whether the constant number was imbued with any mystical or numerological significance.

The first mathematical murder unprovenly took place when a Pithagorean was thrown into the sea by his mathematical brethren, when he blasphemed that the constant value associated with any circle couldn’t exactly be written as a ratio of two whole numbers, which contradicted his master’s numerical gospel that everything in the universe could only be expressed in whole numbers or their ratios.

Pithagorean by Fasters January 3, 2022

Pithagoras

A misspelled or corrupt version of Pythagoras, the Greek vegan mathematician-turned-numerologist, who wouldn’t hesitate to expel, ostracize, or even murder his yes-students should they dare to criticize or challenge his mathematical gospel that everything could be expressed as a ratio of whole numbers.

Those against Greek culture or heritage would deliberately write “Pithagoras” whenever they needed to cite or quote the most famous theorem in mathematics.

Pithagoras by Fasters January 3, 2022