Humanitis Plurificus
The Idea that the Earth is merely a cell in a much larger body, and that humans are the parts of a potentially deadly virus that has infected the Earth cell. The main belief in this Ideology is that the true human purpose is to breed and the destroy the Earth. This belief is mainly based upon the fact that the only other subject that goes into an area, bleeds it of its resources, multiplies and leaves, are, in fact, viruses. It is believed that space travel is simply the carrier that will aid us in escaping the planet one we render it perfectly resources-less and useless. All diseases that effect Humans and actually just Immune responses of this highly advanced being that we are planted within. All other animals are other parasites that are not deadly, like those found in a human body. It is believed that we are right about most things we have decided are fact, but that the explanation for why they happened are flawed as are many of the details. For one the big bang theory is correct, however their was matter before it happened, just not a body (AKA the universe). In fact the big bang was just the collision of a sperm and egg that quickly formed the body that we now call the universe. Also, the universe is in fact expanding, and can be explained almost to simply. The body is still growing. It is believed that those who recycle and have other habits to "save the planet" are defective viruses that go against what its original purpose was, to destroy the cell. It is believed that the cell will be depleted of its resources in an epic battle between the viruses that know their purpose and the defective viruses, in which only two will survive, which will pilot a space craft onto another cell, most likely Mars, and begin breeding, thus starting the cycle all over again.
Humanitis Plurificus by Poopy Vaj Face Nut Lick Mcgraw March 4, 2009
