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Help me to help you 

A totally threadbare request/remonstration designed to merely extort excessive/unwarranted effort/labor from someone, but without said outlay's truly creating any significant improvement in the person's life or in his overall physical/mental/emotional/legal/financial/social status.
Probation officer: Now, Son, you know how much I care about you, and I have your best interests at heart. I need for you to prove to me and my supervisors that you are indeed a responsible-minded young man, though, so I want you to volunteer to work 20 hours a week at the local cattle-farm... it'll allow me to better convince the authorities to "wipe the slate clean" and restore your driving privileges.
Teenager, scowling disgustedly: Yeah, right --- you actually expect me to go and bust my ass in the hot sun shovellin' manure and diggin' fence-post holes for four hours a day, and not get a DIME for my efforts?!??? Sound to me like a classic "help me to help you" stunt just to get some free labor out of me --- no THANKS!
Help me to help you by QuacksO February 10, 2017
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Are you trying to help me grow a beard 

This is a process we’re you let a boy eat your coochie
Are you trying to help me grow a beard

Paying the people around me with money you made from my enslavement to help you keep me enslaved 

And I still don't give a single absolute fuck about historical slavery or child murder.
Hym "Paying the people around me with money you made from my enslavement to help you keep me enslaved now going to be the impetus for child murder. They should have told you to go fuck yourself so I'm going to go ahead and do it for them. Go fuck yourself!"

bang a you-ee 

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"
hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee
Word of the Day on July 19, 2026
The word 'flag' as pronounced by people with thick Belfast accents. The term is a perfect encapsulation of the disproportionate and overblown reaction to the removal of the Union Jack (as in 'de fleg') from above City Hall in Belfast. Where previously it had flown for 365 days per year, it is now flown on 17 designated days of the year - in line with many other British cities.

The event caused a portion of the Protestant community ('fleggers') to make international pricks of themselves as they proceeded to wreck the fucking place, claiming it was another erosion of a 'British' identity they perceive to have been under attack since the horrifying spectre of equality reared its head in Northern Ireland.

The word 'fleg' - and indeed 'fleggers' - fittingly describes a section of humanity unconcerned with knowledge, reality or the vagaries of the English language. Like America's tea-baggers they are ruled by instinct, fear and paranoia with a side dish of rampant bigotry and startling ignorance of the world around them.
"Wat de fuck like! The taigs got de fleg took down! Let's wreck de fuckin place! No surrender!"

"De fleg has been took down! Before ye know it there'll be a united Ireland! Attack Short Strand! God Save The Queen!"
Fleg by OnionFleg August 9, 2013
Word of the Day on July 18, 2026
To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.
"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."
Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026
Word of the Day on July 17, 2026

Hair spider

A tight, tangled knot of loose hair and lint that forms inside clothing during the clothes dryer cycle. It typically hides inside garments, causing an annoying lump or a phantom tickling sensation against the skin until it is found or falls out onto the floor during folding.
I was folding my clothes and a huge hair spider fell out onto my hand
Hair spider by Kmorsels July 15, 2026
Word of the Day on July 16, 2026