A life support machine that a coma patient will be hooked onto. It performs vital circulatory, respiratory and Excretory functions that would have otherwise been controlled by that person's brain.
1. "I'm afraid he's brain stem dead, we're going to have to switch off his comaputer"
2. "Jimbob was hooked up to a comaputer ever since the accident"
2. "Jimbob was hooked up to a comaputer ever since the accident"
by Springbokjake March 31, 2009
Get the Comaputer mug.A computer whiz is a person who is an expert with technology, and can often blow some people's minds with their capabilities.
by Bigdirtyjoe May 24, 2019
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Either school issued laptops or the computers found in the library and computer labs.
Characteristics of a school computer:
-Trash hardware
-SHIT processor and graphics card, inability to run any games. Even something as simple as Minecraft or Roblox wouldn't start, forget about running anything decent.
-Inability to run even anything, even opening up Microsoft Word might crash the computer.
-Grainy 480p monitor from the 70's
-Extremely strict and unnecessary parental controls. Nearly every site will be blocked even the ones such as YouTube and Agar.io. The parental controls are the only thing on the computer that even works
-A pain in the ass and a bad time. You're better off buying a $500 computer yourself
Characteristics of a school computer:
-Trash hardware
-SHIT processor and graphics card, inability to run any games. Even something as simple as Minecraft or Roblox wouldn't start, forget about running anything decent.
-Inability to run even anything, even opening up Microsoft Word might crash the computer.
-Grainy 480p monitor from the 70's
-Extremely strict and unnecessary parental controls. Nearly every site will be blocked even the ones such as YouTube and Agar.io. The parental controls are the only thing on the computer that even works
-A pain in the ass and a bad time. You're better off buying a $500 computer yourself
Person 1: This school computer is trash, It can't even open Minecraft
Person 2: Yeah, let's just save for a real computer.
Person 2: Yeah, let's just save for a real computer.
by TheExtremeEvoker December 24, 2018
Get the School Computer mug.Holly: Demi do you know how many days are in the year?
Demi: No, uhh 267?
Holly: shaking my fucking head. you’re an old computer
Demi: No, uhh 267?
Holly: shaking my fucking head. you’re an old computer
by veronica cancklep June 9, 2018
Get the old computer mug.Similar to whiskey dick. It's when you are on a date with a girl and can't get it up because you spanked it all day while on the internet.
Friend: "How was your date with Suzy?" You: "Ah man, I had computer dick and couldn't get it up." Friend: "Are you fucking cereal? She's hot!"
by Rockabee September 10, 2014
Get the computer dick mug.One who lacks proficiency and competence within the field of computers to the extent at which he or she is an annoyance to others. A computard is prone to asking inane questions requiring one to break an explanation down to mere two word steps consiting of one verb and one noun (i.e. move mouse, click icon, etc).
Dude, this one computard once asked me how to extract a zip file and I was like "Dude download WinRAR" and he was like "how do I download" and I was like "WTF dude".
by Vishal Agarwala July 6, 2004
Get the computard mug.an extremely deep yet sarcastic, cynical, and intelligent person who likes to untag himself on facebook. often causes laughter and has facebook profile pictures that are literary allusions.
by residential emily & lena July 8, 2009
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