Alternativist 

(alt-er-nat-iv-ist)

1) Someone who constantly and compulsively uses things that arent generally considered to be "mainstream", or the alternatives to mainstream things, for the sake of being different.

2) Someone who changes standard, generally-accepted colloquialisms into less known versions (i.e. 'Bing it', rather than 'Google it')

Person A: "I'm going to Yahoo Search that..."

Person B: "You utter alternativist.."

Alternativist by Jyakku October 8, 2010

alternatehistory.com 

alternatehistory.com is a website using forums to post alternate history, which also is known for having a moderator which locks people's forums post even if there new and are trying to make accurate alt-history.

Person 1: Hey I made a post on alternatehistory.com.
Person 2: Cool, but I made one too.

alternatehistory.com by TheUrbanCrafter August 3, 2023

meat alternatives 

Even far less healthy than eating real meat, because of all the artificial chemicals and preservatives and colorings and flavorings and storage conditions.

The soy shit that's promoted by VegetariaNAZIs.

meat alternatives by AYB May 4, 2003

meat alternatives 

Genetically engineered foods, such as Kangaroo eggs, and fish-wings. All this and more can be found at KFC.

Hagged Science-Type-Person: To keep healthy, be sure to have a balanced diet, plentiful with meat... and, meat alternatives.
Crowd: BOOOOO!

meat alternatives by Bastardized Bottomburp May 3, 2003

"alternatives"-ad fury 

The near-maniacal rage you feel when an online vendor/advertiser off-handedly remarks that a desired product/content is no longer offered/available, and then adds insult to injury by cheerfully cajoling, "But no worries --- check out some of our other awesome products/services, like these!", causing you to just wanna smash yer fist right through the screen in resentful frustration, since whatever "substitute" profferings they are showing you have virtually no resemblance whatever to what you were looking for and would certainly not be anywhere near as satisfying; it's almost like they're presuming to imply that THEY know more about what YOU want than YOU do YOURSELF!

Counsellor, sympathetically consoling a late-teens client who is practically climbing the walls in tearful frustration from having been cheekily offered "Super Mario" by an online-gaming website when he'd wanted to play a round of "Spy Hunter Classic" after a long day at high school, just as he'd been doing every evening for the past two years: Ah-haa --- sounds to me like a classic case of "alternatives"-ad fury --- I so totally "get ya", Young Man, and I don't blame ya one bit for feeling this way... a lot of companies sure don't consider what their customers truly want whenever they"update" their offerings, do they? Reminds me of a couple of local radio stations back when I was around your age --- all of a sudden they stopped playing their traditional soothing '60's 'n' '70's easy-listening music in favor of pop-bop and country-crap --- a LOT of adult-listeners were REALLY bummed out about that! Why, I myself STILL sorely miss that wonderful music almost thirty years later!

"alternatives"-ad fury by QuacksO July 13, 2018

Herbal Alternatives 

A high grade Herbal Incense company that started in Cadillac,MI by Mad Scientist, the Lab Rat,C-Bone, B.C., and M.H. they produce products such as T, Darkness, and Herbal Alternatives presents: TEA.

guy1: Do you know where i can get some Darkness?
guy2: yeah Herbal Alternatives on Fb Has some.
guy1: but arent they only in one area?
guy:nope they run from Michigan to Mississippi

Herbal Alternatives by saa_annu June 12, 2011

alphabetical alternatives 

An A-Z list of "non-standard" objects or activities:
AWLternative: A different tool/method for line-scribing and hole-piercing.

BALLternative: Something other than a "bouncy sphere" for kids to play with.
BAWLternative: Doing something besides loud tearful carrying-on.
CALLternative: Any socializing-activity other than a teenage-girl's typical favorite.
CAWlternative: Yes, crows are indeed handsome and smart, but let's look at some other feathered friends, as well.
DOLLternative: A less gender-based toy for young girls.
EALternative: Teaching something other than English as a "second language".

FALLternative: Anything besides tumbling outta da Ugly Tree.
GALLternative: (1) An attitude other than temerity. (2) Less-destructive methods to avoid surface-abrasion damage.
HALLternative: Architecture not employing passageways.
IAlternative: A designation other than feminine.
JAWlternative: Anything besides flappin' yer gums, so dat others can have a little peace and quiet!
LAWlternative: When Steve Lehto speaks about a non-legal topic on YouTube.
MAlternative: Handing a problem yourself and instead of always just yelling for your mummy.
MAWlternative: Any activity dat avoids getting near da powerful chompers of a greedy/voracious animal.
NAWlternative: Any response other than just a flat "negatory".
OAlternative: A different treatment-approach to food-binging besides boring weekly meetings.
PALLternative: Cremation or other burial-procedure not involving a coffin.

More examples of alphabetical alternatives:
PAULternative: Anything not involving everyone's favorite giant lumberjack.
PAWlternative: (1) Anything dat doesn't involve an animal's furry foot. (2) Problem-solving on your own, without always yelling for yer Daddy.
QUAlternative: Any topic not referring to "in the capacity or character of".
RAWlternative: Zheesh, you back-to-nature hippie-freak --- have a little cooked food once in a while!
SAULternative: Seeking da judgement/wisdom of someone other than a tempestuous spear-thrower.
SAWlternative: Letting a tree remain standing.
TALLternative: Consulting a short-to-medium-height person.
UAlternative: Approaching a film-studio other than da MGM-owned giant.
VAULTernative: What da bad guys in da 1971 caper-film "Dollars" should have utilized for storing their ill-gotten loot.
WALLternative: What "Da Donald" should have sought much earlier than now for excluding illegal Mexican immigrants.
WALTERnative: What Achmed should seek for advice/fellowship, since said crabby ol' fart scares da crap outta him.
XAlternative" Pertaining to something other than finance or da stock market.
YAlternative: Anything other than a straight-positive response.
YAWlternative: Movement other than directional-rotation, such as pitch and roll.
YAWLternative: Any wind-driven boat other than da dainty "triangle-shaped sail array" design.
ZAlternative: Any culinary section other than da classic disk-shaped Italian flatbread.

alphabetical alternatives by QuacksO March 17, 2020