Shelf Cock

When a guy doesn't get to use his penis anymore either by not wanting to or not being allowed to.

female friend, "I bet he is slaughtering your pussy right now!"
Friend of female friend, "Nah he has a shelf cock. I would love him to plow me but he wants to wait a little while longer"
friend(male), "Maybe you need me to jam you for a while....?"

friend (another male mate) Maybe the idiot is gay, I'd screw you in a heartbeat!"

by Jenkisani November 10, 2010

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Shelf Tities

Natural breasts that are so huge and horizontal in orientation that they could in theory be used as a shelf of sorts. Shelf Tities most often occur on obese black women, but on occasion can be seen on massive white and hispanic women. Shelf Tities must be natural, ie, huge breasts created via breast implants do not apply.

Guy 1: Hey man, look at that fat woman over there.

Guy 2: Holy Crap! those are some massive shelf tities!

Guy 1: Yea man, I bet you could set your drink up there and it wouldnt fall off.

by SSS383 October 15, 2007

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Top Shelf

Contrary to popular opinion, Top Shelf is actually a high-five maneuver, usually given as a command... Not to be confused with the low or mid versions of the "five"
Also synonymous with Fiver

"Dude, I can't believe your boinking that chick from behind while I'm pumpin her mouth, "Top Shelf dude!" *clap*
(this in turn creates the coveted H-Clap

by Jimbo Dee January 08, 2009

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