ass monkey

A primate trained in the subtle art of ass pleasuring
ahh ass monkey... (rhetorical)
by Sam Haren June 01, 2006
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ass monkey

a man who is constantly made a fool of by bitches
Him a ass monkey when it come to women.
by daedalus October 03, 2003
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ass monkey

A piece of turd that lingers in the rectal domain, caught on by strands of choda hair.
The only way to remove the ass monkey is by cutting the particular ass hair that it hangs from.
"Dude, I got the biggest ass monkey ever."
"Let me see your ass monkey"
by Sameer Ahmed March 10, 2008
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ass monkey

a monkey which drops from your ass ie. a turd
by bread infection October 22, 2005
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ass monkey

someone who is always willing to take it in the ass for the team...
Josh is a real ass monkey
by josh November 19, 2003
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ass monkey

An ass monkey is a common species of primate known to live in the rectum of people that enjoy making others suffer. These people then gain superhuman powers that allow them to torment innocents even further... Some common "victims" of ass monkies are (but not limited to) DMV workers, lawyers, prosecuters, ex-significant others and high school teachers. Many also believe that George Bush is an ass monkey victim...

How to tell if you're an ass monkey:
- Do people avoid you?
- Do you live alone?
- Do little girls and old ladies run away from you in tears?
- Does your neighbor's dog crap on your doorstep?
- Do people flip you off on a regular basis?
...Damn that ass monkey at the DMV... That jerk wouldn't renew my permit even though i had all my ID...
by MydKnight Darkling October 17, 2007
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ass monkey

see MIKElatin; cock sucker who takes credit for something not remotely capable of performing while sucking butt when tattered
I built that HiPo tiller motor all by myself,call me an ass monkey but not a chicken tattered salad tosser
by Thereel Brainthatdidit March 29, 2004
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