Morning Pushups

The act of masturbation in the morning.

I heard Frank doing morning pushups through the wall yesterday.

by reapercrew14 January 30, 2014

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morning wood

What Pinocchio no longer had to contend with after becoming a real boy.

Actually, it would likely have been da other way around --- having no flesh or blood, everyone's favorite puppet most likely could not have gotten a hard-on even if he'd wanted one, plus da elderly carver Geppetto very likely didn't even give Pinocchio a "woodpecker" in da first place. After he became a real boy and was overjoyed to be able to wake up and see his own supple flesh instead of just dense dry tree-fiber, however, he would have also gained all of his "normal male human" bodily organs, and so he might indeed have had to deal with embarrassing "morning wood", especially in a few years when he became a teenager.

by QuacksO February 19, 2023

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Good Morning God Bless

Taking a shit, drinking coffee, and eating egg salad at the same time.

Devon: "Hey, where's Jerry?"
Carl: "Oh he's doing a Good Morning God Bless"

by AnthonyTheVast May 22, 2018

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Morning Dew

When a woman wakes up horny and wet in the morning.

She dreamed of making love to her lover and woke up with morning dew.

by Hannah from phrendly November 16, 2023

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Aesthetic Mornings

A phrase quoted by individuals who believe their life constitutes that of an Instagram profile. A trusty film camera, mug of black coffee and a tennis skirt is all you need to characterise your morning as an "aesthetic morning".

Also: Used ironically to mock someone who believes their morning routine is 'aesthetic' (or) A mocking alternative to "aesthetic warning".

Tom: "Jasmine, those blueberry pancakes look really nice."

Jasmine: "Aesthetic mornings!"

by JazzieThursdays69 May 3, 2021

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