1 definition by keyboardrealist

Men who weasel their way into the friend zone with your girlfriend, with the sole intention of passive-aggressively ending your relationship so that they can be right there for the rebound.

Usually long-time friends of your girlfriend. They've never had the balls to ask her out and have hated every boyfriend she's ever had.

Always beta males. Will most likely end up alone forever as they spend their whole lives chasing a girl who sees them as a little brother.
Alpha #1: Yo, who is that dude who keeps hitting up your girl?

Alpha #2: Oh it's this SATELLITE Steven. He's been trying to break us up for the past year but she thinks he's the nicest guy ever.

Alpha #1: Be careful man. My girl ran off with a satellite.

Alpha #2: It'd be her loss anyways. Ending up with a little beta faggot like that.

Alpha #1: LOL

Alpha #2: LOL
by keyboardrealist December 6, 2011
Get the Satellite mug.