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hextacy's definitions

viola

The world's GREATEST instrument when it comes to orchestras. Many people say that the viola is the target of most of the orchestra jokes, but the truth is that almost every joke has an insert instrument name herescenario. Besides, how could anyone hate violas? Violins are like Icing on a cake. It's nice, but if you have to much of it, you want to throw up. The 2nd best orchestra instrument is the Cello, the 3rd best is the bass, and the worst is the violin.
Studies show that the more violas you have in an orchestra, the better the orchestra is. The viola offers a rich sound, not as high pitched, screachy, and annoying as a violin, but higher than a cello and more portable. As an added bonus, it's easier to whack other people with it and its bow because both weigh more than a violin.
The only down side to a viola vs. a violin is that a violin can play fiddle/celtic music easier because it is lighter. Then again, most rock bands that incorporate orchestra/classical music into their songs use more violas than violins because they're cooler and deeper sounding. Oh, and by the way, for those of you that pronounce it "Vigh-ola", it's really pronounced "Vee-ola", so get it right, cuz it's really fuckin' annoying.
Person 1: What's the difference between violins and grapes?
Person 2: IDK, what?
Person 1: You have to take your shoes off to stomp on grapes.
Person 2: Fuck youm, I'm a violinist!
Person 1: *stomp* VIOLA PRIDE, BITCH!
by Hextacy July 8, 2006
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reality TV

A really stupid idea those fuckshots from FOX decided to develop.
Guy #1: Did you see that new reality TV show on Fox last night?
Guy #2: Uhh..no, it looked too gay. Besides, jumping off a skyscraper for 200 bucks isn't reality...IT'S A FUCKING GAME SHOW!
Guy #1: Survivor doesn't have that!
Guy #2: Survivor was an excuse of a TV show. They interviewed a bunch of fucks on nation TV, turned them against each other, and then gave the winner money. GAME. SHOW.
Guy #3: Yea, and besides, they starved themselves. We're doing a hella great job of making sure our youth aren't becoming anorexic or bulemic aren't we?
Guys #1&2: Where the fuck did you come from? How did you get in?? Get the fuck outta our house!
by Hextacy July 5, 2006
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