Definitions by Whale Butt
Teleporting
Teleporting: the act of driving while blackout drunk or high, coming-to in a ditch with your kids in the backseat(often near a church), or in a Waffle House. See also: "shitfaced”, "FEMA's Gregg Phillips"
Greg Phillips to the police - “And they said, ‘where are you?’ and I said, ‘a Waffle House.’ And: ‘a Waffle House where?’ And I said: ‘Waffle House in Rome, Georgia.’ And they said: “‘That’s not possible, you just left here a moment ago.’ But it was possible. It was real. It was Teleporting. Ask my kids in the back seat”
Greg Phillips "Teleporting is no fun ... You know it’s happening, but you can’t do anything about it, and so you just go, you just go with the ride. ”
* The Guardian “Top US Fema official claims to have teleported to a Waffle House before”
* CNN "Top FEMA official has history of violent rhetoric"
Greg Phillips "Teleporting is no fun ... You know it’s happening, but you can’t do anything about it, and so you just go, you just go with the ride. ”
* The Guardian “Top US Fema official claims to have teleported to a Waffle House before”
* CNN "Top FEMA official has history of violent rhetoric"
Teleporting by Whale Butt March 22, 2026
Teleporting
Teleporting: the act of driving while blackout drunk or high, coming-to in a ditch with your kids in the backseat(often near a church), or in a Waffle House. See also: "shitfaced”, "FEMA's Gregg Phillips"
Greg Phillips to the police - “And they said, ‘where are you?’ and I said, ‘a Waffle House.’ And: ‘a Waffle House where?’ And I said: ‘Waffle House in Rome, Georgia.’ And they said: “‘That’s not possible, you just left here a moment ago.’ But it was possible. It was real. It was Teleporting. Ask my kids in the back seat”
Greg Phillips "Teleporting is no fun ... You know it’s happening, but you can’t do anything about it, and so you just go, you just go with the ride. ”
* The Guardian “Top US Fema official claims to have teleported to a Waffle House before”
* CNN "Top FEMA official has history of violent rhetoric"
Greg Phillips "Teleporting is no fun ... You know it’s happening, but you can’t do anything about it, and so you just go, you just go with the ride. ”
* The Guardian “Top US Fema official claims to have teleported to a Waffle House before”
* CNN "Top FEMA official has history of violent rhetoric"
Teleporting by Whale Butt March 22, 2026