1 definition by That guy hiding in your closet
An atheist is anyone who doesn’t believe in a god or gods. There are three kinds of atheists.
1) The people who don’t believe in any religion but still respect religions and followers of a religion because they know it’s important to them and know anyone can believe anything they want.
2) The really depressed idiots who get bad grades in school or lose stuff or starve their pet etc. They don’t want to lose self esteem so they blame all their problems on God and try to convince people that God is like Hitler or something.
3) The incredibly annoying pricks and attention whores and elitestswho spend every second of their free time finding religious people online or in public and doing everything they can to make them feel bad and make themselves look smarter simply because they don’t agree with them.
1) The people who don’t believe in any religion but still respect religions and followers of a religion because they know it’s important to them and know anyone can believe anything they want.
2) The really depressed idiots who get bad grades in school or lose stuff or starve their pet etc. They don’t want to lose self esteem so they blame all their problems on God and try to convince people that God is like Hitler or something.
3) The incredibly annoying pricks and attention whores and elitestswho spend every second of their free time finding religious people online or in public and doing everything they can to make them feel bad and make themselves look smarter simply because they don’t agree with them.
Christian: *sneezes*
Atheists 1: God bless you.
Christian: Thanks. Did you like the way Church was done last week?
Atheists 1: Well actually I’m an atheist so I didn’t go last week or ever. But I respect your religion and so I just said God bless you because I know that’s what Christians do when they see someone else sneeze. Actually I would like to see what Church is like. You know just to see more of the Christian life. Do you think I could join you this Sunday?
Christian: Sure!
Christian: So how did you do on the test?
Atheist 2: I got an F. Thanks a lot God!
Christian: What? How is that God’s fault? You spent the whole week talking online about how God made you not feed your dog for months when you should’ve been studying!
Atheist 2: Still God’s fault.
Atheist 3: *sneezes*
Christian: God bless you.
Atheist 3: R U FUKIN KIDDING ME YOU FOCKIN RETARD!!? YOU BELEEV IN GOD!!!? HA UR SO FUCKIN STUPID!!! I BET U HAV NO FRENDS BECOZ NO ONE ELSE BELEEVES IN THOSE BIBLE FAIRYTALES!!! SCIENCE IS ALWAZE RITE AND I’M SMARTER THAN U BECOZ I BELEEV IN SCIENCE AND NOT RELIGION!!! GO ATHEISTS!!!
Atheist 1: Hey Christian just so you know he’s not really an atheist, he’s an elitist. There’s a huge difference, believe me.
Atheist 3: FUCK YOU TOO YOU BITCH!!! STOP DISAGREEING WITH ME!!!
Everyone else in the movie theater: SHUT THE FUCK UP ATHEIST 3!
Atheist 3: FUCK YOU ALL!!! YOU’RE ALL RELIGIOUS!!!
Atheists 1: God bless you.
Christian: Thanks. Did you like the way Church was done last week?
Atheists 1: Well actually I’m an atheist so I didn’t go last week or ever. But I respect your religion and so I just said God bless you because I know that’s what Christians do when they see someone else sneeze. Actually I would like to see what Church is like. You know just to see more of the Christian life. Do you think I could join you this Sunday?
Christian: Sure!
Christian: So how did you do on the test?
Atheist 2: I got an F. Thanks a lot God!
Christian: What? How is that God’s fault? You spent the whole week talking online about how God made you not feed your dog for months when you should’ve been studying!
Atheist 2: Still God’s fault.
Atheist 3: *sneezes*
Christian: God bless you.
Atheist 3: R U FUKIN KIDDING ME YOU FOCKIN RETARD!!? YOU BELEEV IN GOD!!!? HA UR SO FUCKIN STUPID!!! I BET U HAV NO FRENDS BECOZ NO ONE ELSE BELEEVES IN THOSE BIBLE FAIRYTALES!!! SCIENCE IS ALWAZE RITE AND I’M SMARTER THAN U BECOZ I BELEEV IN SCIENCE AND NOT RELIGION!!! GO ATHEISTS!!!
Atheist 1: Hey Christian just so you know he’s not really an atheist, he’s an elitist. There’s a huge difference, believe me.
Atheist 3: FUCK YOU TOO YOU BITCH!!! STOP DISAGREEING WITH ME!!!
Everyone else in the movie theater: SHUT THE FUCK UP ATHEIST 3!
Atheist 3: FUCK YOU ALL!!! YOU’RE ALL RELIGIOUS!!!
by That guy hiding in your closet January 26, 2018