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Definitions by Leftists are ironic

Free Thinker 

1. Newspeak term for anyone who supports all left-wing platforms without question or second thought.

2. Another term for non-conformist. Yuuuuh maaaaan you're so unique!!! *pfft*
To misquote a South park episode:

"Hey how do I become a 'free thinker'?"

"You have to hate George Bush like we do, and have the exact same political beliefs that we have."