Johnnie (noun): A well-meaning yet oblivious individual who possesses the uncanny ability to leave bath towels in a crumpled heap on the floor as if the towel rack were a forbidden artifact. Johnnies are often characterized by their insistence that “they were going to hang it up later” and their talent for denying all evidence of damp chaos. Known to strike fear into laundry baskets everywhere, a Johnnie can also be found opening every cabinet and leaving them ajar, like a reverse poltergeist.
by Johnnie’s Towel February 28, 2025