Jack Dollson's definitions

Ash-junkie

A volunteer firefighter so addicted to the idea of battling flames that he begins to imagine smoke and fire where none exist, much like a desperate wanderer in the desert mistaking heat haze for water. Typically characterized by delusions of heroism, compulsive false alarms, and an insatiable need to prove relevance in the absence of actual emergencies.

“Calm down, Johnson—you’re acting like a damn Ash-junkie again; that’s not smoke, it’s just a barbeque pit.”

by Jack Dollson September 3, 2025