Golden Child

First born child, always funny in his mum’s eyes, does nothing around the house besides getting in the way, PlayStation connoisseur.

Currently employed at the local private hospital, working as medical records eye candy/bitch. Mum is so proud as usual.

Mum: ‘Where’s my golden child?’
Everyone else: ‘He’s snorting a line off a Kmart plate.
Mum: ‘That’s my boy!’

by Andos Hastos October 07, 2021

The Charleton

A style of dance generally performed by an individual after dark. It is a convulsive full body thrust often accompanied with sweep the floor. If not done right, could cause serious harm to self and others.

Spike: “Hold my beer, it’s time!”.
Jade: “Do you think it’s a bit early? We haven’t even had dessert.”
Spike: “It’s never too early for the Charleton. Form a circle and Stand back”.

by Andos Hastos October 01, 2021

I have drugs in my bag!

When you Dad goes on a trip to China and thinks it’s a good idea to tell every authority that he has drugs in his bag.

Airline customs official minding his own business: “Ni Hao.”
My dad: “I have drugs in my bag!”

by Andos Hastos September 30, 2021