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v. The act of cleaning ones genitals, post coitus, on a conveniently placed piece of material, when a tissue or similar conventional cleaning device is not near at hand.
Jo: "Shit, what do I do now? I don't have any tissues."

Nora: "Just zwiffle on the curtain! The cleaners won’t mind."
zwiffle by mattylingwags July 19, 2011
Urban Dictionary Merch
'zwaf·fl·ing' Slapping someone across the face on the cheeks with your Penis,humiliating the other person
*bob zwaffles his wife in the middle of a discussion to show her whos boss*
zwaffle by breekz December 29, 2003
Related Words
To zwaffle: Waking up your girlfriend by slapping her gently in the face with your half erect penis.
'Ruud tried to zwaffle me last week but I bit him.'

English version of the Dutch verb 'zwaffelen', a slang word in the student population of the city of Tilburg in the Netherlands.
zwaffle by Ronald Hogenboom May 16, 2006
Ziffle (n.) – a pimple appearing on the buttock
“Man, that chick Catherine has a whole garden of ziffles on her ass.”
ziffle by Penguin Fukker November 1, 2006
Ziffle, a penguin character from the book Santa's Secret Penguin Spy by Nicole Cagle, Illustrated by Laura Reece

Ziffle is not just any penguin. He is a secret spy sent by an agency to help keep an eye on boys and girls expecting a Christmas Eve visit from Santa Claus. Ziffle needs to know just one thing—which children in the world are being naughty and which are being nice.

Ziffle is no elf. Armed with a cell phone with a direct line to Santa, he does not need a train, plane, or even wings to deliver his message. Ziffle can just text a name! But all the boys and girls know that if their mom or dad has to tell them twice, Ziffle has another secret spy device that allows Santa to see the entire human race from the comfort of his big chair at the North Pole.

In this enchanting holiday tale, a secret penguin spy partners with Santa to ensure that children around the world learn that it is always better to be nice than naughty!
Little Brats better watch out. Ziffle will tell Santa is you're being bad and you won't get any presents.
Ziffle by The Mob Boss September 3, 2012
To slap your penis into someones face or somewhere else. Usually happens when everyone is drunk or stoned and someone passes out or falls asleep. When he/she gets zwaffle'd, everyone laughs their ass off.
Guy 1: Look, he passed out hahahha.
Guy 2: Well go ahead, give him a zwaffle
Guy 1 *slap*
Guy 3: w..w w-What the fuck man?
Everyone: AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAH!!!!
zwaffle by Dick September 18, 2005
ass pimples that give the flesh that rough pig flesh complexion --- like Arnold Ziffle (pig on Petticoat Junction).
Gee girl its a good thing I love banging Arnold Ziffle --- because you sure got a load of ziffles.
ziffle by dudelookslikeachimp February 24, 2008
More from Urban Dictionary

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
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