A sexual act in which a man is treated like an electric guitar, his face being the neck of the guitar, and his genitals being the strumming area. Alternatively, a woman could receive a Van Halen in the reverse position, her face being strummed and her netherparts being fingered.
by Dr. Mung May 10, 2004
1.) The dude who said, in his guitar player of the year interview, and for all you Jimmy Paige haters out there, I quote, "wow, this is really a shock. It's not like I'm JIMMY PAIGE or anything; I mean, there are a lot of really great guitar players out there, but Jimmy Paige, Jimmy Paige is God. He's definitely my hero man." Suck That.
2.) Not saying that Eddie Van Halen isn't a fuckin' awesome guitar player, he has a few "Sick Nasty" songs. (fans eat your hearts out)but seriously, give Jimmy Paige a freakin break.
2.) Not saying that Eddie Van Halen isn't a fuckin' awesome guitar player, he has a few "Sick Nasty" songs. (fans eat your hearts out)but seriously, give Jimmy Paige a freakin break.
wow, there arent really any examples i can give... i used them all up in the definition. but yeah Van Halen is awesome. Not as good as Jimmy Paige, but still fuckin sick.
by Your friends at Pro-Logic II February 7, 2008
Quasi-metal band that started the late 70s, featuring the 'virtuoso' guitar player, Eddie Van Halen and frontman/clown David Lee Roth. Some of their early songs (Running with the Devil, Jamie's Cryin') are listenable to most people, but over the long haul, their juvenile themed songs get old. The guitar wanking gets even older.
They developed huge following of high school loser guys who dreamed of being guitar wankers themselves, often playing air guitar in their bedrooms on weekend nights instead of getting out of the house and interacting with human beings. Said fans were disillusioned in the mid-80s when the clown left the circus and Sammy Haggar, an even worse singer, joined. His forte prior to joining Van Halen was recording juvenile themed songs like "I Can't Drive 55" and "Trans Am", obviously something that loser high school kids would latch onto. The closest these loser kids will get to being actual guitar wankers themselves is developing throat cancer and arthritic hips as Eddie Van Halen did in the late 90s. Possible sightings in the future might be a Roth-Van Halen reunion at the Naperville town carnival in 2007.
They developed huge following of high school loser guys who dreamed of being guitar wankers themselves, often playing air guitar in their bedrooms on weekend nights instead of getting out of the house and interacting with human beings. Said fans were disillusioned in the mid-80s when the clown left the circus and Sammy Haggar, an even worse singer, joined. His forte prior to joining Van Halen was recording juvenile themed songs like "I Can't Drive 55" and "Trans Am", obviously something that loser high school kids would latch onto. The closest these loser kids will get to being actual guitar wankers themselves is developing throat cancer and arthritic hips as Eddie Van Halen did in the late 90s. Possible sightings in the future might be a Roth-Van Halen reunion at the Naperville town carnival in 2007.
High school loser, circa 1979 - "Van Halen rocks, man!"
Same loser, circa 2006 - "Put your stretch pants on, honey, and bring *cough cough* me my smokes, we're going *cough cough* to the carnival and see Van Halen. *hack cough hack* And can we stop *cough cough* by your sisters house to borrow some money for beer? *wheez*
Same loser, circa 2006 - "Put your stretch pants on, honey, and bring *cough cough* me my smokes, we're going *cough cough* to the carnival and see Van Halen. *hack cough hack* And can we stop *cough cough* by your sisters house to borrow some money for beer? *wheez*
by Oh Welles September 13, 2006
A really crappy band, and the last name of an over-rated guitarist who thinks that he was the king of the world back in the eighties. They gave a bad name to rock and roll with their poppy sounding love songs and big hair. David Lee Roth to this day stands as the gayest lead singer of all time, even gayer than Judas Priests singer and he's actually gay!
by James TH April 2, 2007
by Sealclubber420 December 3, 2019
Van Halen started life as a paid bar band that gained a considerable live following in the 1970's. Frontman David Lee Roth grew up in an affluent California family which helped the talented Van Halen brothers and their bassist/backing vocalist make it in the Sunset Strip scene.
A considerable part of the Van Halen sound was the futuristic, tehnique laden approach of Eddie Van Halen (guitar, keyboards), although their music remained routed in their classic rock covers band material. Van Halens image, album covers and iconic videos were pieced together or driven by David Lee Roth, who was also a quotable tv and radio personality.
Van Halen is also a prime example of branded music entertainment; the band and its singers have collectively produced guitars, picks, amplifiers, t-shirts, cooking items, bikes, sunglasses, hats, videos, books and a specialist fans-only magazine called 'the Inside', all designed to extend and, some would say, water down the Van Halen name.
Fans are usually in favour of the bands earlier albums, in particular the guitar opus Fair Warning and their chart topping 1984 disc, titled "1984". In 1985 the bands singer and biggest personality was replaced by a mediocre classic rock/80's pomp rock vocalist called Sammy Hagar, who had released excellent and not-so-excellent material since the early 70's.
A considerable part of the Van Halen sound was the futuristic, tehnique laden approach of Eddie Van Halen (guitar, keyboards), although their music remained routed in their classic rock covers band material. Van Halens image, album covers and iconic videos were pieced together or driven by David Lee Roth, who was also a quotable tv and radio personality.
Van Halen is also a prime example of branded music entertainment; the band and its singers have collectively produced guitars, picks, amplifiers, t-shirts, cooking items, bikes, sunglasses, hats, videos, books and a specialist fans-only magazine called 'the Inside', all designed to extend and, some would say, water down the Van Halen name.
Fans are usually in favour of the bands earlier albums, in particular the guitar opus Fair Warning and their chart topping 1984 disc, titled "1984". In 1985 the bands singer and biggest personality was replaced by a mediocre classic rock/80's pomp rock vocalist called Sammy Hagar, who had released excellent and not-so-excellent material since the early 70's.
by Shifty 333 June 22, 2010
An utterly obnoxious 80's arena rock band who had more lead singers than groupies. Origionaly fronted by David Lee Roth, he was replaced by Sammy Hagar, who was later replaced by the former frontman from Extreme.
I remember when Van Halen was cool, then I listened to real music and realized they really really suck
by Keith Kellis May 11, 2005