A curiosity particular to the British Isles, although derived chiefly from the gangsta rap culture of the inner cities of America. Townies are often seen in, as the name suggests, the town centre of any settlement, walking with a distinct bobbing movement akin to that of someone wearing a very heavy backpack. They have a tendency to clothe themselves in unnecessarily large olive-green parkas, tracksuits and plastic baseball caps. This is not dissimilar to a peacock's plumage, with the notable distinction that the peacock's tail feathers are a thing of beauty and make the male bird more attractive to the opposite sex.
On the subject of the opposite sex, it is often possible to observe the phenomenon of the "girl towny". This female variety is not dissimilar to the male variety, except that even more white clothing is worn, in stark contrast to the often orange war-paint worn caked over the faces of female townies. This serves to obliterate the feaures of the "girl townies" and cleverly hide the fact that the male and female of the species are almost indistinguishable without aids to appearance.
Interpersonal relationships among their own groups are often primitive, centred around cheap sexual conquests and who is going to "batter" who. The two are often linked.
The activities displayed by townies often serve to demonstrate a deep-seated aggression, often causing behaviour associated with extreme aggressiveness and violence. This includes a tendency to veer towards a non-towny in the street and "start on" them, at the same time accusing the aforementioned non-towny of doing the same to them. This is often accompanied by swearing, usually "Come on then, you f**king c**t!" or similar aggressive twaddle.
Townies generally have no knowledge of how their sub-culture started, as despite their apparent embracing of black culture, they are usually more likely to take part in a racist assault than normal people like you or I. In fact, any group assault is likely to have townies at the root of the problem.
I hope you have enjoyed reading my definition. If any more evidence/information is required, feel free to watch Crimewatch UK and look at the CCTV footage of street violence. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Seriously, do it.
Norm#1: "What happened to your face?"
Norm#1: "Oh. Right. Tasteful ring."
Ah, the general morons that inhabit England; they seem concentrated around the Northern areas, like a modern era barbarian/amoeba hybrid.more...
Characterised by their clothes, consisting of tracksuits. Logos are a must; also, a recent tread is to wear a hat at the odd angles, AND have a hood up at the same time. In broad daylight. Suspicions are rising that they are going nocturnal.
Another characteristic is the speech. They try to be 'gangsta muthafuggas', taken from American culture. Hey, what do you know; it WAS Rap. Also any phrases (or noises) are taken from popular TV shows. Like 'Bo Selecta', a comedy show. They have a penchant for the word "mint".
Examples of Towny 'speech'
"PROPA NAAARH" <==> "Proper no."
"YA SHTARTIN ME" <==> "You wanna start a fight?"
"PROPA BO" <==> "Wow, that's awesome."
"UEEEH!" <==> No translation. It could be a mating call.
Behaviours consists of:
* Walking into your shoulders, claiming you wanna start a fight, even if they had to come across the road to bump into your shoulders.
* Generally takin' drugs and getting drunk every night, getting rowdy and starting fights.
the list goes on.
they also do not like anyone who does not conform to their ways.
Sample Research was taken from the North Eastern Breed of towny.
One who hangs around town. Formerly recognisible by their shell suit (Circa: 1989), now can be seen with baseball stretchfit cap on backwards/forwards, but to the side slightly and (Inexplicably) one trouser leg rolled to the knee with a sports sock pulled half way up the shin of the same leg. Normally has an IQ not outsizing their own shoe size, the towny travels in packs of at least five, displaying hostile behaviour to whoever does not coform to their rather narrow view of what is 'it' today. This can become particularly hostile if the individual in question may be wearing a band T shirt or is the owner of a pony tail and/or several peircings. Towny's are also noted for their unique method of speech, preferring to use such words as 'Innit' and 'Bad' (Meaning good!!??). They often decorate their bodies, in the form of really cheap and nasty looking tattoos (Known in the tattoo industry as 'scratches.') with the emblems of their favourite football clubs, their girlfriends names (Spelt wrongly.) or a bulldog.
Those guys are townys. Oh shit, there ten of them and seem irritated with me because I seem to be breathing with my eyes apparently open.
Fuckers!!!!Full of it wen theyr wit their "crew" but scared shitless wen theyr by themselves. Give themselves stupid names and think theyr hard as nefink. Widely hated by every1 who is not a towny.
Kill the fukin chav.
local scum who hang around the railings wearing ill fitting tracksuits, one nike glove and one of them crap nike hats on top of their head. they mainly spend all day smoking and harassing passer bys. they also never attend school as they are little fuckers and make everyones lives a misery. townies are the scum of the earth and should all be killed theres no doubt about it. they waste there live inbreeding and robbing and trying to be black people, mainly gangster cunts.
the bingham railing crew who stand all day smoking and drinking whilst odeling passer bys for money and fags, then beat up people for no apparent reason but to impress each other
Ignorant moronic wankers that listen to repetitive car alarms, beat up people who are 5 years old or 89 years old, take pills and go nowhere in life. Hang about in dark alleys so they can rape little kids.
ur life is so shit that u r a towny
nylon coated, logo covered, strippy legged bastards!! that hang around being arragant little bastards!!
that person u c and think what a wanker