1. Messed up completely and without hope; to be in a hoplessly bad condition or position.
2. To spray with water from a hose.
3. Swindled or taken advantage of by deception.
4. To be waylaid and prevented from accomplishing something.
1) This engine is hosed. The pistons are seized and the block is cracked.
2) I hosed down the driveway this morning; now all the leaves and debris are gone.
3) I've been hosed! That Playstation I bought yesterday was an empty case weighted with rocks!
4) A: You, sir, are a hoser. I have done nothing today due to you distracting me! B: Nary, madame, I have hosed you not!

sources: 1) general usage, jargon 2) general usage, literal 3) southern central PA 4) JSD
by ninjamanzz September 3, 2012
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1.utterly and undoubtedly affixiated in a troublesome situation
2. reflecting on a situation in a negative manner

syn: Jacked, screwed, fucked
"we got hosed tommy, we got hosed"
by wise February 14, 2003
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Screwed.
in the 'Dude. You're screwed.' sense.
Sometimes also means Stuck.
"You did what?! Hosed, man.
"When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor."
by burnmonica February 7, 2009
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1. To spray down with machine gun fire.
2. To completely ruin something.
The CO jumped out of the bushes but he got hosed by the VC.

That damn virus hosed my disk drive.
by Secret Agent Man September 18, 2003
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A Canadian term for goofing off, being an idiot or loser.
Death to everyone is going to come, and it makes hosing much more fun " Bonnie Prince Billy
by PonyUp42303 September 6, 2017
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verb: the act of fornication with no regard for the pleasure of the recipient. Usually accompanied by alcohol (see Jack Daniels hosing) and characterized by frenetic intensity.
I couldn't take staring at those jugs any longer. I took her back to my room and gave her a horrible hosing.
by David Savino September 19, 2007
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A hoses is a friend who consoles you after a serious breakup or divorce. This friend will lead you back into the world of being a hoe, much like Moses led his people to the promise land.
Courtney: What am I supposed to do about my life now?
Amber: Don't worry girl, I'm going to be your hoses now
by BZ_BB_843 April 29, 2022
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