A female tampon softly patching a woman's butt cheeks together, via the sticky properties of ovulation, at night while she is sleeping on her back; this process is made possible by the vagina's natural elasticity, as well as the uncontrollable relaxing and contracting while she sleeps, thus, causing the 'tamp' to slide out of the 'vag' (vadge), right into her crack.
Eric - Hey baby girl, how'd you sleep last night?
Erica - I slept great baby, other than the soft patch I woke up to this morning!
Eric - bahhhh hahaha, how severe?
Erica - full on soft patch...mo'fucka stuck my cheeks together like bloody super glue!
Brit - You wanna soft patch Angela tonight?
Tiff - Hell ya nukka!
Brit - hahaha, I've got the 'tamp' & the 'flo' so we're good to go!
Tiff - Let's double patch her, I've got the Red Scare as well!
What you need to land on -- especially when falling from a great height.
Friend: Listen, friend, I can't pull you up. You need to let go... swing your body and aim for the soft patch.
You: OMG. OMG. OMG.
Friend: The soft patch is right to the left of those jagged boulders and just to the right of that rusty metal fence. Aim for that soft patch.