Little blue bastards who use the word "smurf" as a noun, verb, adverb, and adjective. In Smurfland they rule the Realm. But in Middle Earth they are used for sexual practices to tickle the inside of the rectum of the Masters and Lords of the Hobbits in Gondor. However, that's only 10% of them. Within Gondor Smurfs are hunted and killed for the most part.

Smurfs are vicious drunks within their realm. They abuse Smurffet, the only female in the village, and run trains on her. They smurf her with their smurfing rods until she smurfs all over herself. 6 out of the 7 days of the week she runs her trick ass up and down the main road in the valley to the highest bidder. They also gang up on squirrels and tie them down and piss on their faces while Pappa Smurf thrusts his smurf spear into the anal cavity of the defenseless animal. Sometimes Smurffet will drug Pappa Smurf's coffee and will sodomize his blue balled ass until his smurf balls explode smurf juice everywhere.