smackastache 

When you don't shave your grundle and ball sack for a couple months then do an activity so it is sweaty and smells like shit. Then you find a person repeatedly smack them in the face with your sack and rub your grundle all up on there face while getting a rusty trombone. When you are about to cum you turn and bust on there upper lip getting the pubes to become a facial mustache.

Josh C gave his dad a smackastache and pooped in it to match his hair color.

smackastache by TheDumptruckBandit April 19, 2009

sackstache 

Testicular hair. Often a source of pride for Millennials unable to achieve a proper ironic mustache.

Hipster A: Bro, how are we supposed to get into this uber-popular "unknown" brunch establishment with that pathetic looking peach-fuzz on your upper lip?
Hipster B: No problem, my dark-skinned-friend, I am going to flash the hostess this mad sackstache I've been cultivating. She's going to be super impressed and we'll be sipping mimosas well into the evening.

sackstache by Zafu Quazar January 25, 2016