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secretarial assistance 

(verb) 1. The offer of services of a sexual nature toward a work colleague by member of the work secretarial pool;

(verb) 2. The provision of, or assistance with, sexual services from someone who is otherwise employed as a secretary.
Person 1: Has Parkie got a license to drive the bus, or is it just his mates?

Person 2: I think it is just his mates. But hey, did you hear Parkie got some secretarial assistance last night after ten-pin bowling.
secretarial assistance by choogil February 12, 2012
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Secretarial Brain Pool 

The theory that secretaries of the world draw on a communal brain pool which is monopolized by a few, leaving the majority to fight for the scraps of left-over intelligence. Hence the high turnover rate of secretaries in offices. The longer you work in an office, the more this theory reinforces itself.
"Wow, your secretary seems to do a really good job."
"Yeah, she's pretty high up in the secretarial brain pool."

secretarial condom 

The rubber finger tips you put on your finger for sorting papers, so you don't have to lick your fingers first.
She always practices safe sorting at work. Whenever there are documents to be sorted, she always puts on a secretarial condom before she stuffs his envelope.
secretarial condom by RickyDash March 13, 2018

secretarial spread 

Secretarial Spread
Secretarial spread means sitting down for a long period of time while the hind-end spreads outward in order to accommodate the chair. It can be changed with exercise, and activity away from sitting down on one's spread for too many hours a day.
Secretarial Spread
The rear end spreads, the separation spreads wider, and the hips get larger.
secretarial spread by Debra Powers September 25, 2006

bang a you-ee 

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"
hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee
Word of the Day on July 19, 2026
The word 'flag' as pronounced by people with thick Belfast accents. The term is a perfect encapsulation of the disproportionate and overblown reaction to the removal of the Union Jack (as in 'de fleg') from above City Hall in Belfast. Where previously it had flown for 365 days per year, it is now flown on 17 designated days of the year - in line with many other British cities.

The event caused a portion of the Protestant community ('fleggers') to make international pricks of themselves as they proceeded to wreck the fucking place, claiming it was another erosion of a 'British' identity they perceive to have been under attack since the horrifying spectre of equality reared its head in Northern Ireland.

The word 'fleg' - and indeed 'fleggers' - fittingly describes a section of humanity unconcerned with knowledge, reality or the vagaries of the English language. Like America's tea-baggers they are ruled by instinct, fear and paranoia with a side dish of rampant bigotry and startling ignorance of the world around them.
"Wat de fuck like! The taigs got de fleg took down! Let's wreck de fuckin place! No surrender!"

"De fleg has been took down! Before ye know it there'll be a united Ireland! Attack Short Strand! God Save The Queen!"
Fleg by OnionFleg August 9, 2013
Word of the Day on July 18, 2026
To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.
"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."
Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026
Word of the Day on July 17, 2026