raccoonbutter

A form of almond butter that has a watery and gritty texture. Made from pure almonds, without sugar. May be confused with salad dressing because it's oily (DON'T put it on your lettuce). Very earthy and healthy but looks like something you might find stuck to the bottom of your shoe or the side of a dumpster. Made by the "Once Again" company and promoted by a knife-wielding raccoon called Rocky.

Stroker: I can't stop eating the raccoonbutter
Slick: I know, but it'll give you rabies
Snort: So smooth!

by Project_Gordie February 14, 2019