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Quadruped Position 

Aristocratic term for the sexual position that the plebeians refer to as "doggie position".
Where the woman places herself on her hands and knees, while the man positions himself behind her on his knees. Often grasping her by her hips or placing one or two arms around her waist.
Thomas: "Beatrice, might we try quadruped position for our intercourse tonight?"
Beatrice: "Yes Thomas, I believe the modification may be invigorating"
Thomas: "Wonderful Beatrice! Might I suggest Gautier Cognac to mark the occasion?"
Quadruped Position by Rizzey January 23, 2023

Sloth position

When your SO (the one who is receiving) hangs up side down from their hands and legs (much like a sloth) and sucks, licks, takes, the D.
"Babe hang like a sloth for me. I want to try the sloth position" -me
Sloth position by super sloth man October 21, 2014

Loser Position

The Loser Position is where you bring both legs up over your head and point your cock right at your face, or more preferably mouth.
My goddess instructed me to get into the loser position so I could eat all my cummies!
Loser Position by Whatwat3 April 24, 2021

titration position 

When you grab your girl and make her do a handstand so you can get easy access to the poon then spread her legs. Next whip out your dick and your sodium hydroxide and drop some of that shit into her pus til it aint stank no more and its a nice salmon pink.
Man 1: "DId you hit it last night?"
Man 2: "Yeah, but that shit was acidic af so I had to use the titration position on that bitch"
Man 1: "NIceee, Dude!"
titration position by BigDicNic November 20, 2016

Cigarette Position 

Your partner lays down and you light their ass hairs on fire and inhale from their mouth
Broski me and Mrs.Martinez did cigarette position finally it was fire

consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation

The most degenerate form of coitus that you can partake in.
Tom: I enjoy consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation
John: I bet you want to cuddle and hold hands too, you whore!