when you poop its parachute pants.
todya i pooped and it was parachute pants.
by jeremy December 15, 2003
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The empty parachute theory is when someone (can be boy or girl but is usually a girl in heterosexual relationships) dating a boy/girl feels that their being able to get said person shows that they are clearly destined for greater things (better people) so after a while they will dump said person and attempt to find someone else. After they are unsuccessful in finding/keeping a new relationship they will then attempt to go back to the first person, almost as if they had jumped off of a cliff when they broke up with them and now after realising they had no parachute (no chance with others) they are crawling back to the top of the cliff (Original person).

This theory is common in instances where the girl was shy but attractive and the boyfriend is average (or easily friend zone-able) but is friends with a lot of people. Once the girl has become part of his social group she might feel that she can do better and attempts to find others without realising that without dating said guy she doesn't have any sort of parachute and is back at square one (If not lower).
Tim: You know my ex Emerson who dumped me a month back? She asked me out.

Alexandra: Yeah obviously, it's the empty parachute theory, she thought getting you was good but thought she could get even luckier, don't waste your time.

Jacob: Michelle dumped Jim, I wonder why, they were so good together and he helped make her so many good friends.

Amy: Oh that's classical textbook empty Parachute theory. Wait 3 weeks and she will be begging for him back.
by Primmy114 March 14, 2014
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A CEO who gets a fat paycheck after running a company into the ground.
Marge lost her 401K and all her company stock was worthless but the Golden Parachute Punk who drove the company into bankruptcy got a severance package of 20 million...the douche.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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One of the lost Bert Reynolds movies. Made early in his career the film is based on a true story of how the British trained monkeys as bombers during the second world war. The monkeys used to have explosives either strapped to them or around their necks. They would parachute out of a plane, land on enemy soil and them run into bunkers and buildings before setting off the bombs. It was seen as a key strategy in the British removing several men of power in Berlin.

The film stars many young actors and Bert Reynolds appearance as a pilot is short lived (he ends up being mashed by a jet engine). The film failed to make any mark at the cinemas and has been restricted to late night television showings on small satellite channels. The film is famous for the lack of one important thing.. Bert Reynolds doesn't have his mustache in it!
Bert: Monkeys! What the sodding hell do they know about parachutes.
Capt. England: More than a washed up fighter pilot.
by Jessop July 19, 2005
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A term used when a male stuffs his penis inside of a females anal for 5-10 seconds until female preforms a fart; then quickly the male releases the penis from the anal leaving a parachute of poop shooting from the females rectum onto the mans chest. This action can also be done without the discretion of the male.
Guy 1: So bro, how was hanging out with that Russian chick? I heard she does nasty shit...

Guy 2: Ever Heard of a Hot Pocket Parachute?

Guy 1: Um, no; wtf is that?

Guy 2: Go to Urbandictionary.com and look it up.

Guy 1: Are you ok, man?

Guy 2: .......no...
by TommyBecks September 12, 2010
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Its just like pitching a tent in your pants, only air borne. ie. Airplane, helicopter or hot air ballon.

I pitched a tent in my pants on a helicopter = I packed a parachute on the helicopter.
The girl next to me on the flight home was hot and suddenly I was Packing a Parachute.
by gilmoreforereal May 10, 2012
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Pants with a built in rip cord which reveals your member to adoring ladies
I put a huge smile on her face when i did the "parachute pant dance of the exotic panda" on her.
by Davey G April 29, 2004
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