Top Definition
If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines...

UNIX Airways

Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be building.


Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, jump on again, and so on...

Mac Airlines

All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just shut up.

Windows Air

The terminal is pretty and colourful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows NT Air

Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

Windows XP Air

You turn up at the airport,which is under contract to only allow XP Air planes. All the aircraft are identical, brightly coloured and three times as big as they need to be. The signs are huge and all point the same way. Whichever way you go, someone pops up dressed in a cloak and pointed hat insisting you follow him. Your luggage and clothes are taken off you and replaced with an XP Air suit and suitcase identical to everyone around you as this is included in the exorbitant ticket cost. The aircraft will not take off until you have signed a contract. The inflight entertainment promised turns out to be the same Mickey Mouse cartoon repeated over and over again. You have to phone your travel agent before you can have a meal or drink. You are searched regularly throughout the flight. If you go to the toilet twice or more you get charged for a new ticket. No matter what destination you booked you will always end up crash landing at Whistler in Canada.

Linux Air

Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.

When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do what with the seat?"
Sorry, this is the best analogy on the subject of linux, has been around for a long time, and is anonymous.

BTW, linux is the kernel, GNU/GPL software make up the rest of the OS and apps. GNU/Linux is the way lawyers will say it in court.
by danw December 22, 2003
The concept and theory of Linux was really good. The only problem is that most people who develop the code and software for Linux shouldn't even be allowed anywhere near a computer in the first place, because they seriously need to understand the concept of user-friendliness. In a world where technology changes rapidly, the cumbersome command-line terminal has now been replaced by a mouse cursor, and tasks that once took hours of typing can be completed with a few clicks of a mouse. Unfortunately, many Linux programmers refuse to accept that technological change can be good for their favorite operating system, and as a result, they scratch their heads and wonder why Linux is not being adopted by the "stupid masses" as quickly as they predicted.
To all Linux fanboys, the reason why Tux is taking very long to become a household name is not because the users are stupid or "n00b"s or "trolls". It is because there is some major flaw in the Linux design which keeps the end user from picking it up, trying it out, and maybe even offering feedback on how to improve it. After all, software is only as good as the one who programs it.
by Dudley October 08, 2003
It's STILL not worthy enough to be used for the desktop at this point. You'd think that during the years after the Linux "community" made the fatal mistake of throwing their unfinished slop onto the retail shelves in 2000, they would have learned from their mistakes, completed the damn kernel, made Linux easier to use for Average Joe, and worked together to make a COMPLETE OS that includes support for "winmodems" and hardware that's sold at your local electronics store. Unfortunately, that is not the case because instead we have over 200 half-assed distros and the same old religious sermons that the Linux loons made in 1999.
So Windows costs $199.99 at the retail stores and I have to memorize a 16-digit code. At least unlike Linux, it installs flawlessly, is compatible with pretty much all of the hardware on the market, and it gets all my work done efficiently.

I will try out Linux after the geeks drop dead from fighting amongst themselves and no less than five quality distributions remain.

Year of the Linux Desktop my ass.
by true April 25, 2004
n. An OS that is awesome for geeky programmers. For everyone else, it is much too difficult to install and use.
Linux will always have a small installed base on desktop computers, because the only way it can become mainstream is if it loses the difficulty of installation and use. The only way to attain that is to completely change what linux is.
by truth teller December 29, 2003
Many people think it is an OS, but it is actually just a clever trap devised to capture and mark elitist morons so normal people can avoid them.
"Nice to meet you, what operating system do you use?"

"Linux because it is so stable and it runs everything better then eveyrthing else and it is perfect and better then any other OS"

by TheDog November 27, 2005
If you want to see how crappy Linux is without having to waste your time installing it on your computer, try out a live CD of Knoppix or SLAX (Slackware-Live).
I agree with the few people who were brave enough to post the truth about Linux. It is just the same poorly-coded turd that the geeks tricked us into trying out a few years ago, only this time with more colorful GUIs.
by normal person May 04, 2004
A operating system whose only superiorities versus Windows is its server stability and ability to be altered by its code, because its open-source software. Windows cannot be altered like this because learning C++, then butchering Window's code is illegal.

Windows is used by a common computer user who has no interest in running gaming/website servers or being a programmer. Windows is much more compatible, almost everything except Unix/Mac software. Windows is also made by capitalist pigs governed by a monsterous irresponsible behemoth called Bill Gates who failed to completely debug its software in the first place and only does something when somebody personally mails him a death threat.
The linuxers program, and the Windowers use. Enough said. Maccers, I don't know, don't care, only Space Command units use them for their ability to do math better than our common shit PCs.
by Chang Tan October 26, 2003
A kernel made by Linux Torvalds; a product of consumption of an hilarious amount alcohol.
<oppstoppersnopp>Linux is the best
<femilh>STFU, or I'll rape your mother with a Hitlerjügend-knife
<oppstoppersnopp>But Linux is the best!
<femilh>No, BSD is the best.
by Mr. Charles Beastie IV.IV May 17, 2005
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