kalkhoff Share definition Flag when one cries like a little bitch after consuming too much alcohol, wakes up, cries more, passes back out, eventually shitting himself in the process dude, it smells like somebody Kalkhoffed out there! kalkhoff by 1st East January 16, 2007 0 0 Get merch Get the kalkhoff mug. Buy Now — $32.95 See more merch