57
where do i start...

WHERE THEY LIVE:
everywhere. mostly in NJ

WHAT THEY WEAR:
headbands.spikked hair. wayy to much hair spray. ripped jeans. rolled up jeans. earrings. and look absolutely groos all the time :}

WHAT DO THEY DO:
frolic. period.

WHERE DO THEY GO:
most inhabit the local clubs. aka CLUB ABYSS.

HOW DO THEY TRAVEL:
in packs
herkulano and danny are the biggest wannabee guidos :

made with absolutely no love :
kay thanks
by cuties :] March 02, 2007
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58
a tan italian male (female = guidette) who walks around talking too loud about unimportant shit, usually blurting out ignorant or completely retarded statements, such as "hand me that fork so i can fix this power outlet.." or "my tanning oil leaked all over my extra small condoms and seriously compromised their structural integrity, but im going to use them when i have sex with my equally stupid and obnoxious guidette girlfriend anyways!" note: guidettes, although the dumbest form of sluts, are good for temporarily sheathing your cock, although there have been many reports of tripping and falling into an italian womans snatch, so watch out!
that guido just jizzed in his own eye!
hey guido! "yea?" youre a fucking idiot and america laughs at you! "oh."
this is the loosest vag ive ever stabbed with my needle dick, guidette!
by a polack against dumbfucks September 30, 2010
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59
first of all, being a guido is not just a fad in highschool that predominately italians wear its a way of life a mentality but if you want to stereo-type heres a description:


clothing- A/X tee shirts, diesel shirts, wife beaters,sweat jackets usally by puma or adidas part of a matching set with pants, A/x jeans ben sherman jeans , sweat pants, And capris. anything tight that shows off muscle definition.diesel shoes, nike cortezs, pumas. and let us not forget the classic A/x belt equipped with the nextel. lots of gold or silver chains some with italian horns. and kangol hats and sunglasses worn all day and all night.

Whips- BMW'S usally convertable and has a banging system and an italian flag in one or more places, cadillac's, anything expensive that will make someone say damn!

place of birth- could be anywhere but most guidos reside in northern and southern jerzee and parts of new york predominately brooklyn bensonhurst section.

hang outs- joey's in clifton (if youre from jerzee you know the place), spirit,exit, abyss,temptations,djais, any club in the area or the gym mostly gold's gym where can purchase steroidsnot all guido do steroids though.

music- techno,house, dance no rap if any very little. music that can all form a circle around eachother and dance using the guido fist pump to songs like "pump it up"-danzel, " dancin, i got the pills"-oscar g

phones- usally nextel with a cover and loud ringers and constantly showing no matter what they are wearing.


hair-takes longer to do then all your sisters combined, if you have no sisters then to put it blunt a long fucking time. cut into something called a brook, or brooklyn which consists of long spikes on top and sides but sideburns shaved to points and the back is squared off.

other needs to be a guido- tans all week, lifts wieghts and gets hair cut every week.

ethnicity-italian, mostly if not part if not you can dress like one but you are not one unless youre really fucking cool which ive met my share of
"i'm going tanning, lifting wieghts and then going to the club...nick its 4am take your sunglasses off"
by garufiguido February 18, 2005
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60
that guido thinks he's so italian and represents italy to the fullest but can't speak a word of italian and real italians just laugh at him.. fake ass motherfucker
by guidosrgay January 23, 2010
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61
An Italian-American without class who is employed by the Mafia in a low-ranking position. Usually employed as "muscle" but can also be a bag-man, money collector, bookie, etc. Has very little chance of advancing in the Mob because of his substandard intelligence, lack of initiative/creativity, and disregard for cultural sophistication. Tends to dress flashy and a bit garish, i.e. suit coats with t-shirts and gold chains. Often found hanging around strip clubs, late-night diners, or other unofficial places of business.

Note: Can also apply to Sicilians/the Sicilian mob, or to low-ranking members of the Italian organized crime mobs which are not officially "Mafia".
Look at that Guido, trying to impress the ladies by talking about his Mafia connections. If he were really someone important, he wouldn't be talking about it. I bet he's just a thug.
by SashaPhile August 30, 2010
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62
someone from the south shore of staten island ..... spiky hair, orange skin from hours of tanning, and freshly waxed eyebrows are the only way to describe them.... not to mention their "accent" which is not even an accent just a poor attempt to sound like their from brooklyn or like their black, oh and don't let the rest of staten island get a bad rap because of the guido, fake south shore. Not all italian staten islanders are guidos just the ones who choose to be.
Guido A: hey browsky u goin clubbin tonight
Guido B: yea man i just got new spinnaz on my bmw, the bitc*es are gonna love ' em.
Guido A: nice, before we go you want to go stop by the tanning loft then get out eyebows waxed?
Guido B: YOU KNOW IT!
by NorthShorian March 27, 2008
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63
Guidos live mostly in New Jersey and New York but usually come from Italian backgrounds, but most are "wanna bee guidos" which come from other backgrounds like Brizilan. You can tell who is a guido by their outfits. They wear headbands, have spikked hair, use way too much hair spray, wear ripped jeans, roll up their jeans, and sometimes even have earrings. (They look absolutely gross all the time)They usually inhabit the local clubs such as club abyss, and while they're there they usually frolic a lot. Guidos also don't travel alone. They usually have a whole possy of friends which many call "a pack of guidos." Guidos usually think they are all that but they really are not at all.
herkulano and danny.
they are examples of "wanna bee guidos" who come from Brazilan backgrounds.

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