karen: is that ham processed, if it is i dont want it
meat bearer: Ma'am that is an eleven pound whole slab of deli ham. it has no bones, fat, or connective tissue. it is an amalgamation of the meat of several pigs , emulsified, liquefied, strained, and ultimately inexorably joined in an unholy meat obelisk. god has no hand in the creation of this abhorrence. the fact that this ham monolith exists proves that god is either impotent to alter his universe or ignorant to the horrors taking place in his kingdom. This prism of pork is more than deli meat. it is a physical declaration of makind's contempt for the natural order. it is hubris manifest. we also have a lower sodium variety if you would prefer that
meat bearer: Ma'am that is an eleven pound whole slab of deli ham. it has no bones, fat, or connective tissue. it is an amalgamation of the meat of several pigs , emulsified, liquefied, strained, and ultimately inexorably joined in an unholy meat obelisk. god has no hand in the creation of this abhorrence. the fact that this ham monolith exists proves that god is either impotent to alter his universe or ignorant to the horrors taking place in his kingdom. This prism of pork is more than deli meat. it is a physical declaration of makind's contempt for the natural order. it is hubris manifest. we also have a lower sodium variety if you would prefer that
by meatier slab September 30, 2023