Top Definition
Cwanker (noun)
In popular British slang "to wank" means to maturbate. Recent cultural changes has seen an uprising in men who tend to engage in a practice called "cwanking" (simultaneously crying and wnaking). This is particularly common in sexually repressed males who are ashamed of the enjoyment they receive from masturbation. This leads to the expression of anger and emotion during masturbation and many young men can be found engaging in this on a nightly basis.
Girl 1: Did you hear from G last night?
Girl 2: No, he was too busy cwanking over a photo of my feet.
Girl 1: That dude is such a cwanker, he probably calls out his mum's name when he's cwanking because he wants her to know how dirty he feels
by stripedslippers February 10, 2012

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