Connah's Quay 

The largest town in Flintshire. What a shithole.

Whoever decided this was a place for habitation had clearly been snuffing far too much petrol from the Esso. There are two kinds of people from Connah's Quay; Smackheads and Crackheads. Places of interest include the Crickie (If you feel like being raped), Wepre Park (If you feel like being raped) and the Docks (If you feel like being raped).

The local councillor is a pothead and uses public money to feed his addiciton. Crime's on it's arse, because the police are too busy ticking off cyclists for cycling on the pavement and wanting to look like an extra in The Bill instead of doing something useful for a fucking change.

Connah's Quay is world-famous as a breeding ground for potential guests on The Jeremy Kyle show, and currently holds the record for being the most technologically backward place in the world. We're hoping to discover the wheel sometime in the future

A: Have you ever been to Connah's Quay? It's not as bad as people say
B: No thanks, I've heard that being within 5 miles of the place lowers your IQ

Connah's Quay by Liquid Fury November 25, 2010

Connah's Quay Cumberland Sausage

This is where a man uses his sausage to cum over another man's sausage. It is then taken around the town so that other villagers may taste it! This local delicacy and tradition is done quarterly and usually by those who have just started puberty.

Bob: Ooargh, you've got my sausage now give it to the Reverend and let him have the taste of the sperm
Ian: I love the Connah's Quay Cumberland Sausage

Connah's Quay Cumberland Sausage by 69MikeOxlong69 May 6, 2011

Connah's Quay 

A shit place in North East Wales. Full of chavs. Also known as 'Da Quay'. Nothing to do there, except hang around Wepre Park getting wasted.

OMG, I can't believe you live in Connah's Quay

Connah's Quay by 23768 May 10, 2009

Connah's Quay Nomads 

A Welsh football club based in the town of Connah's Quay, Flintshire. They play in the Welsh Football League (Cymru Leagues).

There most successful era was between 2015-2021 where then club manager Andy Morrison won a League Cup, a Welsh Cup, 2 League Titles and got into Europe numerous times and a Scottish Challenge Cup Final.

There most famous win is a 2-0 away victory at Scottish Premiership Side Kilmarnock in the UEFA Europa League First Qualifying Round where they won 3-2 on aggregate.

Attendence figures isn't great as the average attendance is under 200, this is because there is competition being surrounded by a number of the Premier Leagues traditional big 6 clubs aswell as Everton FC, Chester FC and Wrexham AFC.

Some would say they are a hidden 3rd member of the big 3 in terms of footballing ability across the Flintshire and Wrexham areas along with Previously mentioned Wrexham AFC and Chester FC.

There local rivals are Flint Town United FC and Airbus UK Broughton FC, some would also say Holywell Town FC are also Rivals.

They have a historical rivalry with Oswestry Based Club The New Saints FC(TNS). This is due to both clubs being title rivals during the Andy Morrison Era.

Connah's Quay Nomads are a flintshire Based Football Club

Connah's Quay Nomads by CQNJay July 21, 2023