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codesturbation

Code that a programmer produces that serves no purpose other than being self-gratifying. Typically involving some new framework or language feature unnecessarily just because it's "cool" but where it adds nothing.
Sure we could re-write the application to use a more service-oriented model, but it won't gain us anything over what we currently have and amounts to nothing more than codesturbation.
codesturbation by nukespike April 28, 2009

chokesturbation 

David Carridine's death is a clear case of chokesturbation gone wrong.

consturbation 

Jim really needs to get a girlfriend; he suffers from consturbation all day and all night.
consturbation by Garth Y. March 17, 2008

Consturbation 

After you and your girl finish having awkward phone sex then have a non- awkward converstaion about the phone sex.
"Oddly enough... masturbating doesn't seem so bad after consturbation."