Skip to main content

bavarian handbasket 

A Bavarian Handbasket, or 'hand basket', is a sex position for those "advanced nympho" ladies who would like to spice things up a tiny bit in the bedroom and perhaps get a somewhat different reaction from their partner/s than the normal, everyday whips and chains, S&M, and gorilla toss.

Here are the directions for for the nympholadies who are getting bored with finger-in-the-asshole-bj' s, etc... They are very specific so be sure to write this one down on the back of your hand so you can read it and remember while doing it doggy style.

Steps-
1. Firmly grasp your partner's* genitalia, or balls, all the way at the top of where they hang down.

* If having sex with more than one man at the time, then repeat these steps as necessary.

2. When you have a firm grasp on them, rip out as many pubes on them as possible or to your liking, with your other free hand.

3. Take the pubes and lay them across your chest*.

*Really, anywhere on your body is fine. Putting them on your chest, however, is what makes this move Bavarian.

4. After removing all the sack pubes to your liking, twist the ball sack 360 Degrees. If this does not get a reaction from your partner right away, keep twisting as necessary.

5. After twisting the sack to your liking, pull it extremely hard and quick, forcing your partner to get on his knees.

6. When this is completed, separate and take your legs and put them on his shoulders*. Be sure that your feet are locked behind his head so he cannot escape.

*If screwing a midget, this step may be difficult.

7. Now take the ball sack and thrust it into your vagina as much as possible. Release your grip and jack off your partner until he cums*, while the ball sack is still twisted inside your vagina

*If there is blood, then you have done the whole process correctly.

8. You have successfully completed the Bavarian Handbasket. Congratulations! You may now smear your partner's pubes in his face.

"Dude, Carla did this thing to me the other night. She said it was called the Bavarian Handbasket or some shit... said she got it off urbandictionary or some shit."

"Well, how was it dude?!?"

"Dude...it was the best thing ever! She forcefully took my balls, ripped out their pubes, twisted my junk, and shoved it into her pussy, then jacked me off while it was still in there."

"Why doesn't Claire ever do that to me?..."

bavarian handbasket mug front
Get the bavarian handbasket mug.
See more merch

Bavarian Handbasket 

A Bavarian Handbasket, or 'hand basket', is a sex position for those "advanced nympho" ladies who would like to spice things up a tiny bit in the bedroom and perhaps get a somewhat different reaction from their partner/s than the normal, everyday whips and chains, S&M, and gorilla toss.

Here are the directions for for the nympholadies who are getting bored with finger-in-the-asshole-bj's, etc... They are very specific so be sure to write this one down on the back of your hand so you can read it and remember while doing it doggy style.

Steps-
1. Firmly grasp your partner's* genitalia, or balls, all the way at the top of where they hang down.

* If having sex with more than one man at the time, then repeat these steps as necessary.

2. When you have a firm grasp on them, rip out as many pubes on them as possible or to your liking, with your other free hand.

3. Take the pubes and lay them across your chest*.

*Really, anywhere on your body is fine. Putting them on your chest, however, is what makes this move Bavarian.

4. After removing all the sack pubes to your liking, twist the ball sack 360 Degrees. If this does not get a reaction from your partner right away, keep twisting as necessary.

5. After twisting the sack to your liking, pull it extremely hard and quick, forcing your partner to get on his knees.

6. When this is completed, separate and take your legs and put them on his shoulders*. Be sure that your feet are locked behind his head so he cannot escape.

*If screwing a midget, this step may be difficult.

7. Now take the ball sack and thrust it into your vagina as much as possible. Release your grip and jack off your partner until he cums*, while the ball sack is still twisted inside your vagina

*If there is blood, then you have done the whole process correctly.

8. You have successfully completed the Bavarian Handbasket. Congratulations! You may now smear your partner's pubes in his face.

"Dude, Carla did this thing to me the other night. She said it was called the Bavarian Handbasket or some shit... said she got it off urbandictionary or youtube or some shit."

"Well, how was it dude?!?"

"Dude...it was the best thing ever! She forcefully took my balls, ripped out their pubes, twisted my junk, and shoved it into her pussy, then jacked me off while it was still in there."

"Why doesn't Claire ever do that to me?..."

bavarian handbasket 

A Bavarian Handbasket, or 'hand basket', is a sex position for those "advanced nympho" ladies who would like to spice things up a tiny bit in the bedroom and perhaps get a somewhat different reaction from their partner/s than the normal, everyday whips and chains, S&M, and gorilla toss.

Here are the directions for for the nympholadies who are getting bored with finger-in-the-asshole-bj' s, etc... They are very specific so be sure to write this one down on the back of your hand so you can read it and remember while doing it doggy style.

Steps-
1. Firmly grasp your partner's* genitalia, or balls, all the way at the top of where they hang down.

* If having sex with more than one man at the time, then repeat these steps as necessary.

2. When you have a firm grasp on them, rip out as many pubes on them as possible or to your liking, with your other free hand.

3. Take the pubes and lay them across your chest*.

*Really, anywhere on your body is fine. Putting them on your chest, however, is what makes this move Bavarian.

4. After removing all the sack pubes to your liking, twist the ball sack 360 Degrees. If this does not get a reaction from your partner right away, keep twisting as necessary.

5. After twisting the sack to your liking, pull it extremely hard and quick, forcing your partner to get on his knees.

6. When this is completed, separate and take your legs and put them on his shoulders*. Be sure that your feet are locked behind his head so he cannot escape.

*If screwing a midget, this step may be difficult.

7. Now take the ball sack and thrust it into your vagina as much as possible. Release your grip and jack off your partner until he cums*, while the ball sack is still twisted inside your vagina

*If there is blood, then you have done the whole process correctly.

8. You have successfully completed the Bavarian Handbasket. Congratulations! You may now smear your partner's pubes in his face.

"Dude, Carla did this thing to me the other night. She said it was called the Bavarian Handbasket or some shit... said she got it off urbandictionary or youtube or some shit."

"Well, how was it dude?!?"

"Dude...it was the best thing ever! She forcefully took my balls, ripped out their pubes, twisted my junk, and shoved it into her pussy, then jacked me off while it was still in there."

"Why doesn't Claire ever do that to me?..."
It is said of the situation where a person has the bad luck to make contact with his testicles against an undefined surface or object, intentioned or not.
Given the nature of the word, it is more appropriate to design cases where the interaction is made with a moving object, for example, a ball.
Although it is extremely painful for the victim, it tends to be considerably funny to people who witness it.
Today in the baseball game the pitcher took a nutshot; the baseball hit him in the nuts.

Man, I just watched the funniest nutshot video ever.
Nutshot by Uberflaven March 1, 2009
Word of the Day on June 26, 2026

Nerd neck 

A "human" that spends so much time playing video games that their posture is level nerd neck. Everytime anyone goes tryhard they hunch down and their neck gets longer there fore a nerd neck is always hunched down cause they're always going try hard. In other words a nerd neck is a try hard, since their neck is 100% longer than the average human being due to playing too many video games and taking them serious, nerd necks are not even considered human anymore but something more sad. Nerd necks are often found on fortnite, their natural habitat usually being tilted towers.
What a fucking nerd neck!

He is building so fast, nerd neck!

Looser more like a nerd neck ha!
Nerd neck by D Sandwich Maker February 5, 2019
Word of the Day on June 25, 2026

love peace and chicken grease 

"another of sayin peace out or good bye"
Talk to ya later......Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease
Word of the Day on June 24, 2026
slip of the tongue perhaps,
Those idiots who drive around in a ridiculously raised pick up truck, making a top heavy vehicle even more top heavy and unstable
A:*gah*
B: "Whats the matter"
A: This dam prickup is blinding me.
B: Stupid thing's, as if there lights weren't blinding enough as it is.
prickup by lunasea September 28, 2009
Word of the Day on June 23, 2026