A Bavarian Handbasket, or 'hand basket', is a sex position
for those "advanced nympho
" ladies who would like to spice things up a tiny bit in the bedroom and perhaps get a somewhat different reaction from their partner/s than the normal, everyday whips and chains
, and gorilla toss
Here are the directions for for the nympholadies who are getting bored with finger-in-the-asshole-bj's
, etc... They are very specific so be sure to write this one down on the back of your hand so you can read it and remember while doing it doggy style.
1. Firmly grasp your partner's* genitalia
, or balls, all the way at the top of where they hang down.
* If having sex with more than one man at the time, then repeat these steps as necessary.
2. When you have a firm grasp on them, rip out as many pubes
on them as possible or to your liking, with your other free hand.
3. Take the pubes and lay them across your chest*.
*Really, anywhere on your body is fine. Putting them on your chest, however, is what makes this move Bavarian.
4. After removing all the sack pubes to your liking, twist the ball sack 360 Degrees. If this does not get a reaction from your partner right away, keep twisting as necessary.
5. After twisting the sack to your liking, pull it extremely hard and quick, forcing your partner to get on his knees.
6. When this is completed, separate and take your legs and put them on his shoulders*. Be sure that your feet are locked behind his head so he cannot escape.
*If screwing a midget, this step may be difficult.
7. Now take the ball sack and thrust it into your vagina
as much as possible. Release your grip and jack off
your partner until he cums
*, while the ball sack is still twisted inside your vagina
*If there is blood, then you have done the whole process correctly.
8. You have successfully completed the Bavarian Handbasket. Congratulations! You may now smear your partner's pubes in his face.
"Dude, Carla did this thing to me the other night. She said it was called the Bavarian Handbasket or some shit... said she got it off urbandictionary or youtube or some shit."
"Well, how was it dude?!?"
"Dude...it was the best thing ever! She forcefully took my balls, ripped out their pubes, twisted my junk, and shoved it into her pussy, then jacked me off while it was still in there."
"Why doesn't Claire ever do that to me?..."