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16.
Two definitions are often in association with this word. The first of which is a Chump which simply put is someone who bails out on their friends. The second being the Blitz and as coined in How I Met Your Mother involves the "blitz" to leave the group of friends, causing the laws of awesomeness to increase 10 fold.
Damn that Asif leaving again... Oh shit Free Food & Hot Chicks today!!!!!
by Ghat09 December 12, 2010
 
1.
YEAH RIGHT!
Made popular by the movie CLUELESS staring Alicia Silverstone.
Meaning: I'm definetly not going to do that / not into that/ don't beleive that / etc.
If a guy tells me he knows I'm in love with him (but I think he's a total loser), then I say to him "AS IF!"
by Aaliyah Christen January 04, 2004
 
2.
a boggling mastermind
shonk gorilla stomp baby
by bitch im manny August 21, 2004
 
3.
a term used to describe the masters of the art of sexual pleasure. Trained to perfection at all sex positions and sex styles.
Whoa! look at those asifs over there! i wish they notice me, my boyfriend is a pussy when it comes to sex
by german shepard owns November 08, 2009
 
4.
an expression of utter repulsion and or disqust. to be said when thourougly annoyed.
"the sales guy came up to me, and was like, we have the best polyester pants! and i told him loud and clear "as if" and then i walked out the door"
by erin robinson February 15, 2004
 
5.
an expression used to display disbelief
by Heather November 08, 2003
 
6.
Its an Arabic name Meaning "Riches" "one with alot of money"
my name is asif
by Duke™ November 06, 2012
 
7.
an alternative combination of word and phrase for 'whatever'. When put into use, it can effectively confuse the recipient which in turn gives the speaker the upper hand
Charlotte: I win everything!
Chris: ASIF!That's the biggest joke i've heard!
by Chris 'The Great' Gregg January 28, 2009