a complete idiotic asshole

albert - a large sloth like creature that can sleep for weeks at a time. the albert is also the only mamal that has adapted to eating in its sleep .... harmless unless disturbed while eaten... if attacked by an albert your best chance of survival is to tip it over.

The sexual act where a woman is performing oral sex on a man and she inserts a finger up his anus. Named after St.Louis baseballer Albert Pujols (pronounced Poo holes).

A large penis on an ugly man. John Holmes and Ron Jeremy are perfect examples of men with Alberts.

A calm/chilling guy that people tend to ask his advice and perspective on how to get ladies.
Does'nt seem to need much help but will still ask for some.

A person who likes to hit printers.

1. someone i can read like a book
2. someone who LOVES face rubbing sessions.
3. a true FONDLERRR
4. a sweet person i would love to have in my life.