A serious medical condition afflicting many teachers and professors. Symptoms of teacher PMS typically include spontaneous temper tantrums, employment of draconian disciplinary tactics, taking points off because you forgot to double space, and the like. Experts believe teacher PMS is caused by the belief amongst teachers that their jobs are widely superior to all others, and that they have attained a level of moral superiority unimaginable by mere mortals by taking on such important responsibilities despite the typically meager compensation, and as such, they are deeply offended when students are smart enough to sleep through an entire lecture and still score 100% on every test and assignment. Teacher PMS sufferers often use their authority to carry out long-harbored grudges against students who remind them of the football players who beat the shit out of them in gradeschool and high school.
Man, I totally got 100% on every test in my 100 level Philosophy class, but Dr. Archibald-Stubblefield gave me a C because I would always text on my iPhone during class. I tried to appeal it, but he said "Son, your toys have no place in a sanctuary of knowledge." He really needs to see a doctor about his teacher PMS...
by Peejkayne October 10, 2011