| 1. | Spring Break- Lagged | ||
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Similar to the affects of jet-lag, after 7-10 days of drinking until 4 am and sleeping until 3 pm, the intoxicated college student suffers from spring break-lag for 2-5 days. Symptoms include: Missing 8 am's by 3 hours Eating at 3 am Having an urge to consume alcohol during the day Feeling as though 1 am is 9pm and Experiencing vague memories from the previous week. These memories range from the best moment to those you wish happened after a few more drinks. Spring break- lag is an annual hangover experience by thousands of college students. (Tuesday after Spring Break at 2:56 am)
Mike: Yo Steve you want some Texas toast and pizza? Steve: Bro it's 2:56 in the morning and I have class at 8. If you wake me up again I will literally tie you to your bed in your sleep and gag you with my gym sock...yes just like Wedding Crashers minus the gay part. Mike: Slow your roll, I forgot you stayed home for spring break and aren't Spring Break-Lagged. I'll just get McDonalds with Matt after a Nazi Zombie kills him. Want anything? Steve: No asshole, if you wake me up when you get back I'm going to shave your eyebrows off. Example 2: Guy 1: Tryna drink and watch March Madness? Guy 2: Yea, fcuk it I have class tonight but I'm so Spring Break- Lagged I'd take a beer over a water right now. |
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