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Splinter Pussy was a common condition among women in the early 1800's. Housewives, tired from long laborious hours of getting men sandwiches from the kitchen, often relieved their tension through the use of a cleverly shaped rolling pin. However, these culinary tools were often made of wood and usually resulted in the condition known as Splinter Pussy.

Prolonged and undiagnosed cases of Splinter Pussy would often lead to Driftwood Vagina, another common ailment at the time.
Fred was unable to pull out because of the barbs in Selma's splinter pussy.
by Jang Huen November 16, 2010