Risk Assessment 

A form designed by bureaucrats to waste the time of people with useful jobs

1: I need to do this work
2: Here's 4 risk assessment forms to fill out

...days later...

1. Ok I've done that
2. You filled out the wrong ones, here are the new ones

....later still....

1. Look, just tell me what to write!
2. Have you considered that blowing you nose and getting a nosebleed should be on here
1. What? I just want to weigh some stuff that is otherwise kept in the freezer
2. You're using a freezer! Here's another risk assessment to fill out

Risk Assessment by pseuodnymphomaniac October 7, 2015

Risk Assessment 

Risk Assessment is the statistical probability that someone will hurt you

So Britney left him and he is just now getting over it. Later Britney texted him and filled the text with hearts and emoji kisses. Homeboy better do a risk assessment before he breaks up with Ashley just to get back with Britney.

Risk Assessment by Liberation Theology February 24, 2020

Personal risk assessment 

Abbreviated P.r.a,

What is the highest spiritual level of common sense? The nirvana of common sense? Of course it's when a human does a competent pra, or personal risk assessment!

Personal risk assessment by Uncle Dimma December 27, 2021

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.

"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."

Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.

I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.

schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008

eye bleach 

Looking or experiencing something nice after witnessing something horrid like a disgusting gif or a disturbing video. Typically used as eye bleach are nice images of whatever makes the disturbed person happy.

"Bleach my eyes! Why is that woman's face ripped off!?"
*Looks up images of puppies and kittens.*
"That's good eye bleach."

eye bleach by Rini2012 November 29, 2016

Stroad

Noun. Portmanteau of "street" and "road": it describes a street, er, road, built for high speed, but with multiple access points. Excessive width is a common feature. A common feature in suburbia, especially along commercial strips. Unsafe at any speed, their extreme width and straightness paradoxically induces speeding. Somewhat more neutral than synonymous traffic sewer.

Did you see what the traffic engineers want to do to our street? They're going to turn it into a total stroad!

Stroad by hammersklavier February 21, 2012