the result of George J. Mitchell's 21-month investigation into the use of anabolic steroids and human growth hormone in Major League Baseball (MLB). The 409-page report, released on December 13, 2007, covers the history of the use of illegal performance enhancing substances by players and the effectiveness of the MLB drug testing program. Mitchell provides his recommendations regarding the handling of past illegal drug use and future prevention practices. The report names 89 Major League Baseball players who are alleged to have used steroids or drugs.
roger clemens,barry bonds,miguel tejada, gary sheffield, and andy pettite are some of the major names found in the mitchell report
by lukas gestrine December 14, 2007
My oral report on vegetarians was rudely interrupted by johnny's anal report on what he ate for lunch.
by Cap'n Billy July 7, 2009
The show that comes on during second period at our school. Usually, the host will make fun of some sort of concept at the school. For the first episode he proved that dance was not a sport. It's a lot like the Colbert Report only the Madison Report is actually funny, look it up on youtube you'll laugh.
by Jessica Miller April 16, 2008
When the school you curently attend decides to fuck with you and sends all your bad grades home so your parents can bitch at you.
Mom: "Oh, look! A letter!"
Kid: "Noooo!"
Mom: "I wonder what...OH FUCK! GET IN YOUR FUCKING ROOM AND GODDAMN STUDY!"
Kid: "Fucking progress reports..."
Kid: "Noooo!"
Mom: "I wonder what...OH FUCK! GET IN YOUR FUCKING ROOM AND GODDAMN STUDY!"
Kid: "Fucking progress reports..."
by boredlikehell34 December 11, 2008
Son: Hey dad, here's my report card.
Dad: Ok, lemme see.
Dad: *sees F*
Son: Oh sh**, I don't like a look on his face.
*mom comes out of nowhere with a belt*
Dad: Get him...
Dad: Ok, lemme see.
Dad: *sees F*
Son: Oh sh**, I don't like a look on his face.
*mom comes out of nowhere with a belt*
Dad: Get him...
by Frosty 13 March 21, 2018
The source of all nightmares for kids, generally containing mostly C's when the student has promised his parents good marks.
"Timmy, how did you do," Asked the mother curiously.
"Oh...right... Remember how how you told me you loved me yesterday, before these report cards existed...?
"Oh...right... Remember how how you told me you loved me yesterday, before these report cards existed...?
by Vlad E. September 28, 2009
n.: a private diary kept by a swinging couple. The diary maintains partner names, dates, and locations as well as brief descriptions of explicit sexual encounters with anonymous partners. The entries may also include "likes" and "dislikes" of certain prospective partners, in order to gain a competitive edge on the group at future swing parties.
"Melanie and I read one of our swing reports from the 2005 fiscal year...and you would not believe how much we spent on anal-related costs and mergers!"
by Dr. Josephus October 23, 2008